Dear Mr. Winter:
When we first met last December, you totally swept me off my feet.
You promised me days and nights of quiet solitude.
You mesmerized me with your stark, icy landscapes.
You bathed me in comfort.
Quilts, soups, books and needlecrafts.
It was quite a love affair, wasn't it, darling?
Christmas was our Honeymoon, and what a Honeymoon it was.
The lights! The food! The coziness of it all.
I must confess to you dear Winter, that lately, I've not felt satisfied with our relationship.
You just keep giving so much.
I have to think about the children, I mean, the chickens.
They too, have grown weary of your generosity.
It seems lately that you've been showing another side of yourself that I didn't see before.
I'm not here to diss you, darling.
I won't show anymore of your 'dark side'.
It's me, it's not you.
I fear our love affair is coming to an end.
I've met someone else.
Please, don't cry, you know when you do...it snows.
It's for the best.
Is that really necessary, Winter?
His name is:
I know what you are thinking.....I'm sure you've seen it coming. I've been unsatisfied for a while Winter! This should come as no surprise.
I've been unfaithful. I've looked at seed catalogs, and websites you wouldn't approve of.
When we are together, I fantasize about another.
Spring has made a lot of promises to me, Winter.
Things that you weren't able to deliver.
Oh Jamye, you have no idea how much you crack me up. I am ready for spring too. The Burpee catalog arrived yesterday and I poured over it. I am also excited because we'll be getting our baby chicks. At least you have pretty snow, we just have muddy slush down here!ReplyDelete
How funny...a good blog name might be As the Seasons Turn...it has been cool here in Arizona this year but I am still trying to enjoy every day...I know what is coming...110° days and then I will be hiding out....ReplyDelete
If we in FL are waiting for Spring, I know YOU must be too even more so. I do have fond memories of Springtime up in IN, esp the first cuttings of lawns...ahhh the fresh smell.ReplyDelete
I could not have worded it better. My sentiments exactly.ReplyDelete
That's hilarious! I gave up complaining about the weather for Lent... but if I hadn't... I would say "ditto."ReplyDelete
Jayme, you are a literary genius, whose words never fail to give the soul a lift. Have a perfectly, happy day :)ReplyDelete
To everything turn, turn, turn, turn... there is a season turn, turn, turn. AND IT'S NAME IS SPRING... Bring on the Hoes!!ReplyDelete
The Blue Ridge Gal
OMG....one of your best posts ever!!!ReplyDelete
From one hoe to another!!
Sick of snow, here....and more on the way!
Bee Haven Acres
This is excellent! I could not have said it any better!! To darn funny. And the picture of the hoe...well, you are one clever girl.ReplyDelete
We can't help but want to see the green grass on the other side! It's not cheating on Winter, he's overstayed his welcome this year! Great post Jayme...ReplyDelete
That is an absolute hoot and I completely agree with you. Don't feel too bad, I'm betting he'll be back around to woo you in about 9-10 months. And you'll fall in love all over again. :)ReplyDelete
Too funny! Thanks for the early morning humor - and the thoughts of spring. It is still far off for us here but, yes, we dream... You are such a wanton woman, Jayme!ReplyDelete
It's definitely time for a spring fling! Winter will get over it. He's used to being dumped this time of year.ReplyDelete
OMG....You are too funny girl! I am with you on the spring thing, enough already! We are in for another storm by the end of the week in my neck of the woods and I am not looking forward to it! Ugh, I'm going to drool over my gardening books again, have a good day!ReplyDelete
You are hilarious! I laughed out loud at the last pic. Keep on keepin' on!ReplyDelete
Heehee.. you wee 'hoe' you.ReplyDelete
Love the winter's last blast shots there.. simply stunning indeed. Like Jack Frost just decided every wee thing must be touched.
Amen sister! I'm breaking up and moving on too but that dang'd 'ol winter is stalking me.ReplyDelete
If this is not one of the funniest, imaginative, and cute posts I've ever read...then I don't know what is.ReplyDelete
Seems winter has overstayed his welcome everywhere by all the comments. Here's to the Hoes!ReplyDelete
I wonder if YOUR spring is the same as MY SPRING! I think he may be playing us...ReplyDelete
Yes this latest snow up here in Northwest Indiana is making us weary - at least it has been a pretty snow this week - big, fat fluffy flakes! It looks much better than the hard, dirty snow that was piling up!
Great post Jayme. You are very clever with your writing. I can't really relate to the never-ending winter you're having, since it didn't arrive this year in the Pacific NW. But I do remember last year's winter and I was so excited to see spring when it finally showed up. Hope you're seeing the last of the white stuff soon.ReplyDelete
love your dear john letter to winter! hilarious! i'm feeling the same way but i know that spring in sd is still an elusive lover, at best!!! a girl can dream tho, and i've been doing that! love the "feeling like a ..." you are soooo funny! thanx for a good laugh on a cold (1 degree) winter's morning...
Jayme, there is a gal over at Cobble Hill Farm that needs your chicken advice. Her first little one just hatched. http://lifeatcobblehillfarm.blogspot.com/2010/02/shes-or-hes-here.htmlReplyDelete
Great post! As always, you leave me sitting here with a smile. I think the different seasons are far from enemies. They relieve each other of the difficult task of being beautiful. Unfortunately, 'John' Winter is a stalker! You had to go and make him cry. Now we are expecting more snow tonight in NJ!
Hate that old Man.ReplyDelete
He pretends to be so nice...in the beginning. I think he's a con artist, plain and simple.
Great Post!!! Too funny! I'll definitely be following you. I think I can relate!ReplyDelete
Funny entertaining post.ReplyDelete
Yes I have had enough winter.
All our snow is gone but it is only 15 degrees today. bbbuuurrrr
I'm cackling like one of your chickens right now. The very last pic was HILARIOUS.
I'm sure this piece is worthy of a Pulitzer Prize! If only the whole world would read it!ReplyDelete
Great writing, yet you know me, very symbolic of spiritual things. I enjoyed it sooo much. Wish I was a gardener like yourself. Seed catalogs would make soo much more sense. One of your best blogs but I love em all anyway. smooches, RaReplyDelete
Winter will let you go for a season (or two or three), cause he knows you will take him back, arms open wide, after you tire of your other lovers. Spring is fleeting, summer even more so, and autumn will only be giving you a taste of what is to eventually be back in your thoughts.ReplyDelete
We love 'em and leave 'em, but eventually we all come back.
But,, till then, bring it on Mr. Spring!
I secound that thought!!! I am ready for something other than snow and ice...ReplyDelete
You are so clever. Don't worry, winter will eventually leave you because that is just the kind of SOB he is.ReplyDelete
I'm one too!!ReplyDelete
ditto, ditto, ditto...
i feel the same way!! thanks for the laughter. perfect way to put it.ReplyDelete
You are one funny chick :)ReplyDelete
Haha! This is great Jayme!! :)ReplyDelete
Ah Jayme, this is hilarious...and so well written.ReplyDelete
I too feel the same way, but I am sure when the heatwaves start, we will be looking for this old man winter.
The pictures are so beautiful.
Those photos are lovely...makes me want spring but NOT SUMMER! I would rather have the cold than the 90's.ReplyDelete
That was very, very funny.ReplyDelete
Where would I be without my daily dose of the coopkeeper. Jayme you are so funny, so so funny. I too am ready for spring. I was in Target today and they had all the gardening tools, patio furniture, and seed packets out. As I passed that section of the store I smiled out loud. Longer days and warmer temps are only a month away, up here in Minnesota anyway.ReplyDelete
since we are friends..this is for your own good. Winter has been visiting me since December too.
I always knew there were others..but I didn't know it was YOU until just now reading your Dear John letter.
I've had enough..you may have him.
I am moving ON..I am skipping Spring and jumping right into Summer.
Hey girl, How can you be so creative at six in the morning? Geez,you are such a dynamo. I too am really tired of winter and looking forward to spring. I hope I get to see your garden this year because from the pictures I've seen from past blogs it really looks beautiful. Anywho,keep up the great blogs. CynReplyDelete
Girlfriend. You are too funny. A Dear John letter to "winter." Oh, my gosh, I had so much fun reading your letter. And, the photos are wonderful. The chickens in the snow. I LOVE your house!!!ReplyDelete
We had three days blue skies and warm temps and now rain. I was able to get a photo of the daffodile in our Grass Valley backyard. And, we actually have a few blossom on our plum tree.
How is Aaron? Have not seen him lately on your blog. Please say "hi" to him for me.
Thanks for being you!
I enjoyed stopping by your blog.ReplyDelete
I see you were interested in the postcard exchange. If you want one from Oklahoma, please email me so we can trade cards.
Oh my thoughts exactly!ReplyDelete
Oh, Jayme. That was priceless! I've been absent from blogging for a month or so and it is so refreshing to stop by here and get my guaranteed chuckle for the day. Have a good one.ReplyDelete
This is about the best blog post I've ever read! AMEN SISTA!ReplyDelete
I'm going to link it in my blog tomorrow, hope you don't mind :-D
Spring must be a to timer.. because he's been romancing me too ;)ReplyDelete
i don't think winter'll take it personally, of course he's been getting A LOT of rejection lately...oh well, he's strong. i'm sure he'll be back. *wink*
ditto! I'm ready for warm sunshine and the smell of compost.ReplyDelete
first time here, from TD's blog. how cleaver and creative and cute! love it!ReplyDelete
yes yes yes we are ready for spring!
let it come!
ahahahaha! That was great!!! :) I love it! :)ReplyDelete
Just stopping by from Bubblegum Diaries to say hello. Great Post!ReplyDelete
Love your babies.
Oh... sorry I'm so late getting to this hilarious post! I'm so glad I found you! I'll be here daily now..ReplyDelete
With everyone else :D
OH, I love your dear Mr. Winter letter. He has been such a player, teasing us. You are so funny. Love the photos!ReplyDelete
You are also quite the photographer. You should try selling some of your wonderful photographs on RedBubble.com. They host and print postcards, prints, and posters. Check it out. I enjoy your blog. LP in VA.ReplyDelete
I love it! I live in Canada aka Artic wasteland. I'm SO SICK of the cold, the snow, the stuck indoors frigid weather....ReplyDelete
I don't know that I ever had more than an uncomfortable first date with Winter...he knows we never had a chance. I've always preferred palm trees which he has yet to deliver.
Amazingly lovely photography--and amazingly entertaining post. I 'specially like your ending.ReplyDelete
Cute, Jaymers...really cute. I was having much the same thoughts this morning. Alas, the sun is shining today, so that should melt the latest snow fall in no time flat...IF it stays out for any length of time.ReplyDelete
This was so funny that I am speechless. Well done.ReplyDelete
I agree. Move on girl. Winter is a fraud. Pretty on the outside until you get all comfy- cozy and then he shows his dirty side. Ugly, dirty, side. I am so over him.ReplyDelete
Miss you my genius friend!
This is so well written. You really are a humorist at heart aren't you? Every time I read your posts I think, well this is the best one yet, and then you post again and it is even better! You know it needs to be said, that of the many things I might think of you, well, a hoe isn't one of them! LOL!ReplyDelete
hey, Spring's been down here in Arkansas too...that two-timing scoundrel!ReplyDelete