As I sit here now typing - I'm on my front porch.
Taking the last tepid sips of my Twinings English Breakfast tea - listening to the birds, enjoying a cool breeze, and waiting for Aaron to rouse from the camper.
I have to take him back to Chicago today by 11.
He's assisting with a photo shoot at the school.
Happy for him, sad for me.
We'd planned on going to the Chicago Botanic Garden today.
I'm all thinky inside.
My period is now five days late - so either I'm preggers or menopausal.
I'm sharing old pics today, just cause I haven't the time to pad about and take photos at the moment.
I'm so thankful and grateful that my pap smear came back normal, and I find my heart breaking for those that don't get the good news when the phone rings at times.
I'm utterly filled to overflowing with gratitude for my life right now.
I'm grateful that I'm finally starting to live in a place where I'm kind to myself,
as kind to myself as I am to others.
I see the beauty in myself, as I do others.
I'm my best friend.
It's so very clear to me now, on this early August morning.
So many life lessons can be found in the garden.
This is what I realized this morning.
When I look out the back door - and look over the garden - it's glorious. It's full, it's colorful - it's really beautiful.
There are flowers to cut, smell, or just enjoy -
There are fruits and veggies that feed me, the bugs and birds.
There is abundance.
But - if I look too closely - with a critical eye - there are weeds, there are bug bitten leaves, there are areas that need some loving. There are things planted in places that make me think "What the heck were you thinking?" There's the attitude or thought that 'it could be better - I could try harder - I could spend more money'.
If I'm not careful - I will concentrate on those areas and miss out on the beauty of the rest.
As short as summer is here in NW Indiana?
A pox upon me if I do it.
How often do we do that in our own lives?
I still scold myself for the 20 lbs that I should have lost - forgetting I've lost over a hundred.
I still scold myself for dust balls under the bed, instead of thinking I'm pretty great for making the bed everyday.
I still scold myself for choices and behaviors from the past - when there is absolutely nothing to be done about them, only to learn from them.
It's just human nature I think - but we can change if we apply ourselves.
And sisters, don't you know - it's our human nature to even make that work.
We'll make a list of all the things we want to change about ourselves, and try to figure out how we can struggle to do so.
The number one, biggest thing that has changed me from the inside out?
For now my precious friend.....just be. I love who you are. The flaws in your life, few as they are, make you interesting. Everyone has good stuff, it's the not so perfect stuff that reminds us that we are connected to each other as humans. No one better than the next. Hugs and love you. Enjoy Aaron and tell him I miss him and our laughs. Rho~ReplyDelete
Jayme, I am going to practice those queenisms. LOL Actually last two weeks I have. While fighting a sinus infection with my second antibiotic...I broke a tooth clean off at the gum line..went to my dentist with an emergency.He fixed the tooth till I can get to the oral surgeon...thanking God it happened at home , not on vacation. As I park at the dentist that day...the check your engine light came on...what more is all I thought at that moment..you know how we are. So I do the gas cap thing which sometimes makes the light go out..well no luck on that, drive right to the mechanics,, they take my car in , lucky me...I walk to my daughter's home, close by, counting my blessings....2 hours later the car is fixed and it was the cheaper problem...counting my blessings. And this too happened in town not while on the road...see I already do those Queenisms. Blessings to you too Jayme. xoxo,SusieReplyDelete
I struggle with cutting myself some slack. I constantly belittle myself for shortcomings. I really hate behaving this way.ReplyDelete
I am so happy for you and your result. Keep on thinking these deep thoughts. So many fail to examine and just gloss over aspects of their inner workings. Have a wonderful day.
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This is something to contemplate every single day. Life is so much perspective and gratitude... Thank you for sharing your morning "thinkings" with us. I certainly benefitted! Happy for your good pap news!ReplyDelete
Such a great message this morning, while I was agonizing over everything I didn't get done this weekend :) Enough of that! Thanks, Jayme!ReplyDelete
It's hard to have an attitude if your heart is filled with gratitude!!.....:))))) Have a blessed day!ReplyDelete
This may be my favorite post. . .lol. . .I know I say that often Ü honestly, I will print it and add it to the the other 25 favorites I have in a folder, I took that folder to the beach with me last week, and just re-read them as I do often. . .ReplyDelete
I think everyday we shall all start saying a prayer for the sista that didn't get the negative pap smear what do you think, see what you started . . .thanks for that
The hubster put a scare in me last year, my mind went to the worst, shame on ye of lil faith, but it did, . . .his results were negative thank the Lord, and I thought right then and there I could never have another bad day in this life after that. . .omg that week I had his funeral planned ::::sigh::::
Sad that we need that as wake up calls, but your post today reminded me of that entire week one year ago this month, and I somewhat had forgotten about it, but we need not. . . we need not forget the negative results, eva. . .
Oh happy day my friend, thanks for the best post once again. . . I think you should write a book.. . "Tales from the Coop Keeper" it's got a nice ring to it with you holding the chicken on the cover, or. . . the pic of the chics on your shoulder. . . think about it, go to Gretchen Ruebens site, the happiness project, (great book) I betcha she'd give you the heads up getting that published! I'm excited, winter project. . . the coop lady becomes author.
Oh. . .the one on Worry is my favorite. . . the one you decided what you wanted to be when you grow up. . "me" the best!. . . ordinary days working with your hands. . . and Jan 9, 2012 morning walk, too many to mention, write the book. . . I'll buy it I will I will Ü
Love your "life lessons from the garden." ;) I agree totally about gratitude. You must read "One Thousand Gifts" if you haven't. :)ReplyDelete
Excellent post, Jayme! A good reminder. Gratitude is an outlook that can change your life! Ann Voskamp really helped me with my outlook too. Beth K. (It's fun to follow you on facebook!)ReplyDelete
You are so right, thank you for reminding me, KathyReplyDelete
Ya know, I make mistakes and make an ass of myself every day of the year. Then I just go BAH... who cares. LOLReplyDelete
You've got a glorious life...and you share. You deserve every good thing!ReplyDelete
I'm feelin' the words Jayme -- bless you for stirring up our sense of gratitude in the little, ordinary steps of our days. Love the photos and love the post and most of all - love your good health news that makes us all grateful too Jayme.ReplyDelete
A wonderful, warming, loving post, Jayme. I love seeing your life through your eyes- xo DianaReplyDelete
I think you should write a book too. Visiting the Coop Keeper I always receive and giggle often too!ReplyDelete
Oh my! I've had to play catch up as I've been blogless in Seattle lately (or Lynden...close enough) and I'm screaming over the post on the relationship with your nurse practitioner! Cells in your lungs! I can laugh, cuz now I've read the rest and am so happy things are all right. Scary times. You think it won't be you, but why not? I always think it's going to be someone...why not me? Worry wort that I am.ReplyDelete
I'm jealous of Aaron in the Squirrel. yes. I am.
Words to live by, absolutely Amen, sister. Amen.ReplyDelete
What a great post! And....I so wish I had a little pink trailer like the one pictured on your post. You know, that photo would make a great screen saver.ReplyDelete
BING! The light is on girlie! Welcome to the surrender of a (cough) more middle aged/menopausal moment in your life. Someone (of course a man..ugh!) said it to me, that he told his wife "Your not a kitten anymore". Double ugh! I wish I would have said back to him at the time "No, but she's a cat with nine lives, so look out"..oh men!! Yes, we can still surrender a bit and not feel so guilty about it and not be so hard on ourselves. Life is just too precious and too short. I have my energy days and then some not. You got it girl, and its ok Jaymes. Take in your world around you and don't focus too much on the imperfections, just marvel at nature, everyday living, whatever the day brings and humble yourself as best you can. Hooray for your results coming back good I say. Prayers still being said for those who are waiting or fighting a battle. On the gardening front, well I am embracing this gorgeous cool down. It was a day of digging and I loved it. Was outside all day. Oh, Aaron, you are one lucky guy in so many ways,camping out in the squirrel and a ride back to the city in the adorable bug and with good company! Hugs Jaymes..you are blessed. P.S. Botanical sounds wonderful. Keep it on the list, as summer isn't over yet.ReplyDelete