Thursday, July 5, 2012

Why

The big cheese - David Greenwalt - and the other Asst. Coaches - Bootcamp Graduation Party 2012

I'm completely rested now.
My heart feels extra full this morning.

I know this blog is 'Tales from the Coop Keeper' and all - and it rather started out about living my life here out in the semi-rural corn fields of Indiana.  Truly, that's still what it is.  I have every intention of talking about chickens, and homemade laundry soap, and gardening, and sharing recipes.


I mean - I have every intention to talk to you about how I'm raising birds for meat and all - and how hard it's been.  I have a buttload of recipes waiting in the wings to share.  All my Aaron drivel has been seriously neglected (he's doing fantastic, by the way).

But.

In the past two years - I just feel that there has been such a change going on inside of me, and I just can't help but to share it - and it seems so much more important than laundry and pie crusts.
For those of you that choose to stick around and read it - I'm humbly grateful.  There's so much to learn from each other.

It's started with a physical decluttering of my house, learning to live without, learning that less is more.  The next thing that I worked on was decluttering my body, and now I'm moving on to decluttering my mind.

baby Jax

Remarkable.
I feel that I'm a different person, yet the same.
The new improved Coop Keeper.

I've given up busyness.
It's incredible.
I realized I was complaining and bragging at the same time about how busy I was - like it was a badge of honor - like it made me 'worthy'.
Pfft.

I just had an emotional phone conversation with one of my dearest friends - well over an hour - as I encouraged her to let go of her fears and take the leap to change her life from the inside out.
Sometimes - I feel that I'm on the other side of a river - hollering out - "Come on!  It's not that bad!  The water is ok - ya, there are some leaches and snakes - but you'll make it!"
I like life on this side of the river.
I like it so much I never plan on going back.



Today I wanted to share something with you, that we Leanness Lifestyler's call "My Why".
It's an assignment that we have to do early on in the program.

I'll say no more now - just share this.
I hope that it sparks something in you - and spurs you on to make a change in your life.

After a couple of posts - sharing with you the incredible stories and transformations of a few of my friends, I'm going to talk about chickens.
Pinky swear.

- My Why -

I want to be physically fit so that I'm mentally and emotionally fit.  I want to be mentally and emotionally fit so that I can face the trials and adversities that life brings with strength and grace.  I want to face the adversities of life with a strong mental attitude, an attitude of joy, determination and peace.
I want to be fit so that I'm taken seriously.  I want to be taken seriously because I feel that the things I have to say are important things.  Living life in the present, choosing happiness, loving your family and being thankful.  I want to be taken seriously because I want to feel like my life has mattered and made a difference in other people's lives.
I want to achieve my fitness goals so that I can participate in endurance events like the Chicago Half Marathon. I want to participate in endurance events  to prove to myself that I can achieve everything and anything that I set my mind to - so that I can be proud of myself. I want to prove to myself that I finish what I start, and each success will continue to build until I live a life of fully completing all the things I set my mind to.
I want to lose weight so that I look better.  I want to look better when I see myself in the mirror.  I want the mirror to reflect back to me what I believe deep down in my heart - that I am beautiful.  I am strong.  I am worthy.
I want to achieve the body of my dreams to that I can live the rest of my life to my full potential.  I want to live to my full potential so that I'm not a burden to my loved ones as I age.  I want to be a blessing to their lives, and not a burden.  I want to remain a well of joy, peace and hope that my family and friends can continue to draw from for many years to come.
I want to live my life to the fullest, with energy to spare.  I want to live with energy to spare, because of living so many years, with barely enough energy to finish the day.
I see myself living well into my 90's, vibrant, loving, with goals and dreams yet to fulfill.  I see myself needing no medication, my mind sharp, my body spry.  I see myself living an incredibly full life before all is said and done.  I see myself - youthful, vibrant, full of life.  I see myself active, on my bike, camping - helping others.  I see myself dressed as I've always wanted to dress.  I'm beautiful.

I want to do what I percieve to be impossible.  I want to be on the treadmill finding my strong, I want to lift weights with passion and energy - knowing that the time I spend in the gym, truly gives me strength - physical, emotional and mental strength for the rest of my day.
I see myself at my goal.  I can taste it.  It's in my immediate future.  I'm sculpted, but not ripped.  I'm tan.  I'm toned.  I'm smiling.  I smell great.  I have on fitting, bright colored clothing and I'm surrounded by people I love.  I truly have it all!
I want to conquer my lifelong struggle with food, so that I can pull someone else out of the pit, and give them hope and motivation that it's not too late - they can do it too.  I want to be a living example of abstinence, acceptance and humility.

I want to be free from the addiction of food, so that I can feel that I live an authentic life, that I am who I say that I am, and that I'm not tripping up constantly over the land mines of addiction.
I want to be physically fit, enjoying healthy foods, living the Leanness Lifestyle so that I can help others.  I want to be a part of the feeling that others will have as they begin to change their lives.  I want to give hope transfusions!  I want to walk or run across a race finish line with someone and put the medal around their neck and show them YOU CAN.

I want to train hard so that I'm able to participate in these awesome sounding fun 5K's like 'Dirty Girl' and the 'Color Run'.  I want to feel my body moving freely - I want to feel strong and have endurance.  I can see myself covered in mud with Fi - laughing - bonding - and pushing ourselves past our limits. 
I want to honor my ultimate aspirations daily.
To walk humbly in unequivocal abstinence - to me, that is the hinge that my very sanity is swinging on.  I'm no longer willing to ride the merry go round of addiction.

ps - if you are interested in the Leanness Lifestyle program, I would seriously love to talk to you on the phone - or via email.  Just email me and we'll chat.
:-)

14 comments:

  1. I'm curious.
    Keep posting and sharing.

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  2. Jayme- What a great post- I love YOUR WHY! Man, girl, you GOT IT. You are something special all the way around. I don't care if you ever get back to chickens- I'm here for you no matter what you are talking about- xo Diana

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  3. You are an AMAZING inspiration!! Congratulations on all you have accomplished!
    Velvia

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  4. Jayme,
    Love this post. Love you. I'm hovering from 16-20 lbs down. I've been taking kickboxing for the past 6 wks. Getting ready to sign up for the next 6 wks. It really helps me find my core and balance and center. Grandma can kick! I'm getting ready to buy a new bicycle- hopefully on Saturday morning. I'm going to ride like the wind! Grandma can ride! :-) You inspire me. I inspire me. I want to be fit and strong and get down in the floor with Little Bee and play. I have to walk briskly through the airport for the next twenty or thirty years. Or run to make that connection. Thanks for this good writing. Keep preaching, sister. We, your faithful congregation are listening. Love to you, sister. xo, Cheryl

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  5. I am looking forward to more decorating, chicken stories mixed with stories about your nephew.

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  6. Jayme -- I love visiting your blog - whether it be chickens, Aaron or whatever else is on your mind AND I especially enjoy and am encouraged by your journey. My own journey has not been via Leanness Lifestyle Program but there are still more parallels than not - I draw a lot of encouragement and strength from your sharing.

    Blessings!
    Gail

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  7. I love how you are living your life out loud. . .

    Inspiring everyone of us to want more, learning that by not letting go of the fat, and doing the WORK to get there, we hold ourselves hostage to life, . . . a great life. . . a life of energy. . . a life of passion, we all hold the key to that life. . .

    It's always good to be reminded of how hard it was, losing weight is not for sissies you didn't get where you are today by not eating bacon, if it were just that easy, I remember you a year ago, exercising in a 90 degree house, with no a/c (naked comes to mind). . . you have to be really committed to wanting this life, and it's easy for us to get there with you showing us the light at the end of the tunnel, sew talk on Jaymster, talk on. . . talk about it forever, your life has evolve right in front of us, and we are all blessed to be a part of it . .ahhh I knew her when she was a sweaty naked exercise chicken lady . .kudos girlie. . .

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  8. Great post!! Inspired me some- see email please :)

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  9. I met an incredibly wise old man once and sat down to chat with him for a few hours, picking his brain and gleaning as much as I could from a mind that has "seen it all". One particular thing he said has stuck with me for over 15 years. He and I were discussing weight and the shift America has taken to obesity. He said it drove him crazy to hear obese people say, "I'm fat! I HATE myself!" He said, "If you truly, deep down in the recesses of your soul, hated yourself... you'd be GLAD you were fat, and you'd eat more. You wouldn't yearn to be thin and release the person you know you could be! The fact is, you LOVE yourself and know that you deserve something better, so you indulge ~ albeit in the wrong thing. And that is what needs to change. They indulge in the very thing that is killing them."

    I truly think some people do hate themselves, and there are true food addicts, but there are more people in your old situation where you KNOW your potential and just need the encouragement of that other person on the other side of the lake shouting, "You can do this, too! Let me show you which lilly pad to jump on!"

    You will make an amazing coach, Jayme!

    Hugs,
    ~Kate

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  10. I just wanted to pass on a compliment. This morning my hubby was looking over my shoulder as I read your post. I showed him your pics, told him you just lost 100 lbs at age 50, and his response was, "No way! She looks like she's around 20!" I agree! You look mah-velous darlin'!!!!!

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  11. Love that you shared something so personal, Jayme. It will help someone, my friend!

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  12. My email is dianneferay@gmail.com. Please email. thanks

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