Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Chicken Sponsors Needed


Dear Readers
As you know - some chickens are horribly mistreated.
Deplorable conditions.
No love.
No human contact.
Sadness.

Many meet their demise in ways I shant describe in detail.

Enough said.

Here at the Coop - we nurture our birds, and shower them with treats and loving kindness.
You can be assured that we house some rather pampered fowl.


Due to recent additions of Mallard ducks, assorted Bantams and a half dozen or so new layers -
things are becoming a tad over crowded.
I find it difficult to give each bird the attention it deserves.
Ducks are forced to cohabitate with felines.


This taint natural.
Some birds are left in solitary confinement much too long.


The diaper costs alone have been breaking the Coop Keeper's budget.


Friends, it's in a true spirit of humility - I ask for your help.
For a generous donation of $39 a month -
you can assure that these fine fowl are given the best treatment.
The treatment they deserve.

Wouldn't you sleep a little better every night knowing that you helped?
Your sponsorship helps fund these chicken activities, and more...

Physical therapy...


Proper hygiene...


 Prompt medical care...
Weekly Sunday drives in the country...

Anger management courses...


Daily exercise classes led by certified chickens...


Interpretative dance classes...


Beauty pageants...


Art classes...



And of course -


Food and clothing...


Included in your sponsorship of only $39 a month:
Photos of your sponsored bird, as well as daily egg reports, delicious recipes (for eggs!) and correspondence from your chicken.



  Can you find it in your heart to help? 




I dream of a world where chickens roam free - and their motive to cross the road is not questioned.
Be a part of the solution my friends.
Sponsor a chicken today.


 The end. 

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Just Dropping By....

Girls - (and boys?) -
I'm here.
I'm alive.



I've been incredibly busy - and my beloved cousin came up from Missouri rather spur of the moment on Easter for a short visit.

We've been having a gay ole time, dodging rain drops, exercising, and general tom foolery - although it feels like all we've done is cook and do dishes.
Did you know that cauliflower makes a fabulous rice substitute?
Did you know that I've lost nearly 30lbs?
There is mounting evidence that I do indeed possess a skeleton.

Me and my cousin Jim.


Did you know that the Dr. told me today that I shant be gardening or lifting weights?
My eyes welled up with tears.
And they weren't tears of joy.

It's Tennis Elbow.
I like to call it by it's proper name:
Lateral epicondylitis
Cause I ain't never played tennis.
Perhaps it's vacuuming elbow - or knitting elbow - or gardening elbow - or coop cleaning elbow -
take your pick.

Thank you for your sweet emails and Facebook messages -
it's so nice to be missed.

I'll be back in a day or two dispensing my usual dose of an attempt at humor, wisdom and seldom known chicken facts.
And maybe a video or two.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

The Day the Chicken Died - A Repost


Picture of Helen - April 2009 - after raccoon attack

One of my favorite things about blogging is to be able to go back and see what was going on in my life a year ago - this is the post from a year ago today....
I'm happy to see that I've made changes in my life, and I'm taking care of myself now....
I was absolutely stunned by your outpouring of sympathy at the passing of dear Helen.
I'm here to tell you what happened.
I'm surprised at how saddened I was at Helen's death.

I really enjoyed nursing this little chicken.
She needed me.
I needed her.


Saturday morning started in the usual way.
Sleeping in til 7.
Tending birds.
Fabulous coffee.
Bacon.

As soon as I was coherent enough, I began doing yard work.
I've made this elaborate list, lining everything out that needs to be done, week by week, day by day, in order to keep my on schedule for the Lowell Garden Walk in July.
The next three weeks will be rough.

I noticed late morning that Helen was a little more to herself than usual.
Her tail was a bit drooped.
"I gotta keep an eye on her", I thought.

At noon, I went off to my Beekeeping Class.
Yes, folks, I'm getting bees.
Scary, isn't it? My cousin Jim tells me I might as well learn to juggle chain saws while I'm at it.
That really cracks me up.


Here is the president of the club, Mark, showing us how to use the hive tool.

Here we learned how to light the smoker.
Smoke - good.
Fire - no good!
(You have to say that like Frankenstein to find the humor)

The Vice President, Ed, taught us the proper terminology of the hive, so we didn't call him up and say....'Um, Ed....like that little thingy on my hive is glued with honey, what should I do?"
Please note the observation hive behind Ed.


Aaron's been at it again with the camera.
He was so encouraged by all of your comments!
The rest of the pics in this post were taken by:

The following text will have nothing to do with the next five photos.
I hope it doesn't confuse you!
Keep up people!
I got home from bee class about 5:30.
I promptly put my hive together.
Although my sister-in-law and niece were visiting, I found it impossible to sit after sitting in bee class for 4 hours.
I
had
to
move.


I decided there was enough time to finish cleaning the chicken coop before dark.

Helen was now in the nest box.
I thought she might lay an egg.
Her first egg ever.

You see, Helen has never layed an egg.
T'aint normal.
I really don't know why - but I'm assuming it had something to do with the raccoon attack.
She was barren.
Another thing we had in common.
We understood each other's pain.
She sat in the roost box, with her vent pulsing a little.
I picked her up, and even with my gardening gloves on, I could feel she was burning hot.
Fever.
I do believe animals have a sense.
All the chickens knew.
I didn't know yet.

Aunt Jemima watched as I removed Helen from the coop.

Scarlett seemed extra worried.

No name (He's since been named Buddy) was even concerned, and he's normally quite aloof.

Mrs. Puffington nearly worried herself sick about Helen.
Even the cat looked on, a bit grief stricken.
I didn't think too much of this. Helen has been so frail, and has had to come in the house before, and even wore a diaper for a bit.
If you never read that post - click here.
In a sick way, I looked forward to babying her, and nursing her.
I put antibiotics in her water, put her in a nice, clean, warm place.
She expired sometime in the night.
I just couldn't believe my eyes.
Glenco handled the arrangements.
I'm still not really sure what exactly happened, but I'm tending to think that perhaps her body finally formed an egg, and she couldn't lay it.
Eggbound?
I was so worried about the other chickens.
I watched them carefully all day Sunday for signs of illness.
They are all fine.
It was Helen's time.
Even in her death, she taught me a great lesson.
In the midst of the busyness I'm experiencing right now with the garden - which seems to be of paramount importance - in the grand scheme of things - it's meaningless.
I've been experiencing above average fatigue and joint pain.
I know I'm overdoing it.
I'll be doing a full post on this subject very soon (like - when it rains and I can actually be inside!)
Our days are numbered, and I really want to spend my days to the fullest, and that doesn't necessarily mean work. It's all in our attitude, our mindset. I'm so work oriented.
This must stop.

(I'm happy to report that is HAS stopped!  I am much better at managing my time - even though I stay incredibly busy - the stress is gone - my health has greatly improved over the last year - )
So teach us to number our days, so we may receive a heart of wisdom.
Psalm 90:12

Monday, April 18, 2011

Crazy Chicken Lady

Up in this house - this is completely normal behavior.



You see - it's a sad tale actually -
 a tale of heartache and woe - much too much for a Monday morning.
I was a bit of a neglected baby - I slept in a dresser drawer when I was first brought home -
the neglect wasn't intentional - just circumstances.

Ergo - I have an oral fixation.
I blame the lack of breastfeeding -
I want to put everything in my mouth.



And you thought I kept chickens cause I liked eggs.
Can I let you in on a secret?
If I eat another egg I swear I'll gag to death.

What's that?
Yes...I do live in that apron.
Wouldn't you?

Friday, April 15, 2011

Finding My Jayme Legs



I really need to have a stern talk with the person responsible for making my schedule.
I've had nary a moment to celebrate the moments of my life.
Nary.
I don't cotton to being this busy.
Not one bit.
I was told today that the tendonitis in my right arm might be from me waving it saying 'I'll do it!' -
Now that's funny - I don't care who ya are.


I thought I'd finally tell you about the spectacular day that I had with Aaron a few weeks ago.
It was a splendid day in many ways.
I felt free, and calm and mentally organized.
My clean eating is paying off.


It was Aaron's day - I told him I'd take him anywhere he wanted to go -
It started with Starbucks, the AT & T store (he's obsessed with cellphones) and then the
Blue Room Cafe.
It's a little place we drove by one time, about a year ago - and Aaron wanted to go there.
It's in downtown Hammond, Indiana.


This is Bobby. 
He's the elevator man.
Read that again.
The elevator man.
Well, that just makes me swoon.  We had to take the elevator up to the bathroom.

I fell in love with this old building.
It had so much character and charm.


Y'all know what a hard time I had adjusting to Aaron going back to public school this past fall -
I honestly feel like I'm finally getting over it.
I'm finally finding my legs again.
I was so completely lost feeling.

photo by Aaron

I felt vacant.
Paralyzed.
Purposeless.
Free.
Scared.
Alone.
Pregnant with possibility.


This 15 year old punk was my heartbeat.
Well - he still is.

At the moment that Aaron took this picture of us in a dirty old bathroom mirror - it dawned on me -
I'm ok.  He's ok.  We're ok.
Things are different now - but they aren't bad.
In fact, they are pretty good-and if I wasn't careful, I was going to miss it.  I was going to grieve away all the joy that we have now.
We have great days together now.
We have great talks, and we still laugh until we cry - or pee - which ever comes first.


This is John, and he's the proprietor of this wonderful cafe.
There was a wonderful vibe in this place - a pulse of peace that was palpable.
I could have stayed all afternoon.


While John prepared our food - I struck up a conversation with Robinson.
He was quite the chatter, but got shy when I asked if I could take his photo.
We chit chatted about music and life.


He told me that he chooses happiness everyday.
He told me he leaves his problems at home.
I love Robinson.


And I love chicken salads -


and Aaron loves panini sandwiches...


and I love how my hair looks here - so I put this pic in...
I can do that...I'm the blogger.


John does latte art.
Law.
I didn't have a latte cause I've been dairy free - but I tell you what....
next time I see something like this, I'm drinking it - I think it would be worth the bloat.
Life is too short not to drink lattes in awesome coffee shops.

Life is too short to look back so much that you miss what's ahead of you.

This is the snapshot I took away from the day.
Taking the time out to enjoy.
Taking time.
Taking.
Enjoying.
Being.
Peace.

Monday, April 11, 2011

'Spring Chicken' Skin Serum on Etsy!


Dear sweet sweet readers!

I'm tickled pink!



Ya'll busted my heart seams clean open -
thank you ALL so much for your support of my new business venture.
I feel like I have hope again - something I was beginning to lose -
I might just make that July goal after all!

There were a couple of you that commented that you wanted some serum, but there was no way to get ahold of you - so I've gone and opened the Etsy Store a wee early, even though it's not really 'ready' - but at least the skin serum is there.

I ordered more lip balm tins today so next week I should have some of those for sale as well...

here's the link:


If you haven't heard from me regarding your skin serum purchase - please go ahead and click on the Etsy link to purchase (Debra, Talia)

Sorry to make it so elusive at first, I was just too excited!

If you missed the 'infomercial', make sure you check out yesterday's blog for it.

Again, thank you - I'm so excited, I can barely contain myself.


Sunday, April 10, 2011

The Official Skin Serum Infomercial!

I finally did it.
Completed it.
Bottled it.
Be-ribboned it.

Aaron even made an ad for it -
I can't get over how much I love this photo.
That kid never ceases to amaze me.


Here's the official infomercial....
Watch for it on CKTV - (Coop Keeper TV)


Of course, there are bloopers here.
 I've come to greatly admire people that can talk live on TV and not make a fool of themselves.
..my bloopers?
Well, the cat attacks the tripod - I misspelled 'infommercial' in the title - which is still troubling because 'infomercial' doesn't look right either- and I say there's 'nothing natural' in this product, when it should be there's nothing UNnatural.  And then of course I never do say what the product costs.

Law.

If you find yourself up in the middle of the night - watching this - wanting this product - please send me an email with your info -
I accept Paypal, checks and money orders.
It'll be in the Etsy shop soon - which is still in the works - but I couldn't wait.

The cost?
$19.50.