Friday, April 19, 2013

Name This Post

So the bee hives are moved, and I look like this:

I'll back up.

Tuesday was a wonderful day - I was up working by 4:30am and getting SO much done.
The weather was cooperating, so I decided to prepare to move the beehives when Glenco got home from work.

I even did a little online research about it.

Remember my veggie garden plans?  Well, I went out and staked that area a week ago, in preparation.  I found a gob of newspapers, and I ordered up some wood chips from a local tree service.

If you look closely, you can see my string and stake - and then in the background is Cabeeni Green and my burn pile.  Don't you love this photo edit?  I just started using  Loooovvvee it!

And of course, I already put my swing over here just to get an idea of how things would look.  You see, I'm not a very good visualizer - I really do have to play around a lot.  

Now, I am planning on painting that swing some fun colors, and growing some morning glories on it, and some sunflowers behind it, zinnias next to it.

This is a 32 x 38 area, a nice big veggie garden.  I imagine sitting in the swing with a glass of iced tea, looking over my 'domain'.  From here I'll be able to see the garden and all of the chickens.

And then....then Glenco tells me this - I heard it in an almost in a New England accent  - like an old man warning me of some maritime danger - 

"You know that garden right there is over our septic leach field"

Say what?  Whatever.

Then I decided to research that a little bit - and as usual - I found information that said it was just fine, and other information that said I'd grow a third eye - but the general consensus was that it was OK, but not ideal.

Now, I've got three acres, so it doesn't HAVE to be there.

Upon mulling and pondering, I decided to make that my 'bee yard' and just fill it with flowers and my beehives, and to put the vegetable garden out where the beehives are now - which used to be a big vegetable garden, so the soil is actually pretty good out there.

Does it ever end?  This musical chair business!?
I hope so.

Now with the decision to move the beehives into this area - I promptly got to work laying down newspapers and what wood chips and sawdust I toted home from Missouri.  It didn't go far.  I'm realizing how big this area is!  I at least got an area big enough for the beehives ready.  I'm still waiting on the wood chips to be delivered to do anymore - 

So, Glenco gets home after working for 10 hours, and we've both been up since 4, and I, as sweetly as I can - say 'honey - we have to move the beehives today - the weather is going to be perfect for it the next few days (I need to keep the bees in the hives for 48 hours after moving) and this truly is our window of opportunity."

Bless the man's heart - he's willing.

Now, this is where we really start to blow it.
We get dressed to go out and mess with it - it's now about 6pm.  I figured with the weather the way it was, cool, a bit drizzly - there are not going to be any bees flying about - so why gear up?

I'm wearing jeans, a long sleeve top, a hoodie, and a pair of coveralls.  Gym shoes and my awesome goat wrangling gloves I bought in Missouri.  Glenco is about the same.

We go out and start closing up the hives.  No troubles at all.  We blocked the entrances, and duct taped over them.

We need to start getting the cinder blocks out from under the hives, so we pick the smallest hive and move it out with a dolly, and get the cinder blocks.

This is when Glenco tells me that where I'm putting the beehives is woefully unlevel and we stop working for a good half an hour whilst we 'discuss' the area I've chosen and decide to make the best of it.  

Moving the beehives with a dolly in the rain, after being up and working for 15 hours already isn't a lot of fun.
We were pulling them uphill over VERY unlevel surfaces.  I'm still sore.

Suddenly - a bee appears.  It lands on Glen's arm - he's well protected with his coat, and I decide to brush said bee away, and I do, and it makes a bee line (I totally get that saying now) right to my forehead and stings me.

I kinda laughed about it - it didn't hurt that bad, and I was like 'what are the odds?'
We continued.

We are on the fourth out of seven hives.
Well, something happened, and I'll spare you the details, something with the lid sliding and out pours a ton of bees.  We run from the area and decide...well, at the very least, we should get our veils on our heads.
Glenco tapes his gloves on his wrists.  I do not.

We head back out - get that hive placed.

Remember the hillbilly hive I had setting on a chair?
That one was next - and it was really hard to get off the chair - and well...the bottom slipped out from under it as we were lifting it - because, you see - we failed to 
Blame it on tiredness - blame it on taking short cuts - but we didn't strap them together, so this hive bottom slips, and my hands go right up into the bottom of the hive as thousands of bees that are thinking 'what's going on here?' pour out - (did I mention by now, it's decidedly dusk and we can barely see?).  

The next thing I know - I feel bees climbing up the inside of my sleeves.  I'm trying so hard not to freak out.
I sort of calmly left the area saying to Glenco - "I'm in trouble, I'm in trouble".

He's following me trying to untape his gloves so he can help me.

I get stung - once, twice, three times - I'm losing count, I'm crying, I'm trying in vain to get all of my clothes off.  I'm now completely topless in the backyard crying.

I cannot properly convey the horrifying feeling it was to feel bees climbing up my arms, trapped in all of those clothes.  This picture was taken the next morning, where my clothes still laid - I figured there were full of bees, so I didn't mess with them that night - plus, I was traumatized.  All that debris on them is from the maple tree - those aren't bees.  They were soaking wet from it raining all night.

I came in and took two Benadryl, took a bath and ate a sweet potato in the bathtub.  Oh I forgot to tell you that I told Glenco we'd have dinner after we moved the hives.  Ya.  Went to bed and slept like the dead - woke up really swollen and pretty miserable.  My eyes were almost swollen shut and it was almost impossible to keep my glasses on from the swelling on my face.

Good times.

We still had three hives to move.
The next day, Wednesday - we totally geared up, strapped the hives and had them moved an in place within minutes.


So - what would YOU name this post?

My ideas?

How Not to Move Beehives
If I Only Had a Brain
Someone Left My Clothes Out in the Rain


  1. My idea: "So...Here's the Latest Buzzzz......"

    Or how about: "What's So Bad About Store-Bought Honey??"

    Ahhh, the best laid plans, huh? Hope you're feeling better very soon!

  2. My idea; "Bee Still my Soul..."

    Your garden dreams sound beeyoutiful (that is not part of the title.. just sayin' to explain...) - which is why I think one would want to say "be still my soul". But you said... you slept like the dead.

    Your Soul was sounds like.

    :) I hope you're feeling better - soon, too. So sorry..

  3. BeeGeez? - hope you are all healed up today!!

  4. You poor thing! I hope you are all better soon. How about "I fought the bees and the bees won". Jean

  5. How about "what gear not to wear". Sorry you got stung so bad!!! Hope you are better every moment of the days ahead!

  6. OMG, i sure hope you heal quickly. that sounds terrible. please don't hate i'm sort of giggling imagining you running around stripping off clothes & screaming. forgive me for that. i hope you can giggle about it later. i hope & pray. ( :

  7. You poor sorry, what a mess! Glad you were brave enough to go out and finish the job..not sure I would have.

    I like I fought the bees and the bees won! Funny although I am sure you didn't think so!

  8. The Latest Buzz......or
    Just a Day in the Hive...a short story of a menopausal woman.

    Oh my Jayme, bee careful!! It's only April.

  9. Oh you poor dear.

    I don't think give another thought about naming this post. Those bees have caused enough trouble already.


  10. That's awful.
    This gave me chills: I sort of calmly left the area saying to Glenco - "I'm in trouble, I'm in trouble".

    Bee well.
    See what I did there? :)


  11. My oh my! Bees really can get women outta their clothes faster than men :). Feel better!

  12. MisBEEhaving and a Case of "Sep-tic" sorry.....sounds like my life....hope you are better soon...:)

  13. Jayme, Aren't you glad you lost a few lbs before you were running around in the yard nekked? I bet Glenco sure was glad he decided to help you out after a long day at work. :) A name for your post "Don't Worry, Bee Happy" or "A Sight for Sore Eyes!" Happy Friday!

  14. And I thought I was having a bad week. Well, at least the bee hives are moved.. hopefully for good. Pam

  15. OMG, been there, done that! I have had to shuck my clothes more than once in the yard due to cutting corners with my bees. I feel your pain. Hope you feel better soon.

  16. "Topless is Bee-coming"

    OUCH! I love it that you harvest honey, but, honey, I don't think its worth it! Take care!

  17. Why is it that I can get caught up in the seriousness of your stinging bee incident yet I am laughing out loud at your stripping your clothing off and running around the yard buck naked.
    I am so sorry I don't have more consideration and class to regard your misery . . . forgive me!
    You poor thing . . .

    I wish I was near to treat you kindly for a bit . . .

  18. Never under estimate the value of your bee gear. I did not get stung once last year. First trip out this gear...stung twice. Learned my lesson too. :)

  19. I hate to say this but I was laughing so hard. I'm so sorry that you experienced this. My dad had bees and I know all about suiting up. Thanks for sharing. Hopefully, they are safe & sound.

  20. Oh you poor thing! I'm so sorry!!!

  21. Oh - You poor, poor girl! I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I bet it NEVER happens again. I hope you don't get worse before you get better! Blessings-xo Diana

  22. Smoker?.... I don't need no stinkin smoker!!!! The bold and the Bee-utiful. I know that feeling of bees crawling up your legs or arms.... Sheer controlled terror. My dad had bees. Guess the winter was too long. You forgot your safety rules.. But I'm sorry cuz while I was feeling your terror, I was also laughing so hard tears are running down my face... You paint a very vivid picture..... And well... Funny. The look on Glenco's face had to bee....priceless. Love ya!!! I need to stop by when you have time. Got you clippers for kitty claws and some of the body butter I made. Let me know..

    Cedar Lake

  23. You need to get an epi pen for real! I was just at a bee venom presentation and you have he'd anaphalxic reaction! You can't mess around with this. A lot of times after a reaction like your reaction you have a secondary reaction which many times is when your throat swells shut. You don't want to have that happen when you are sleeping. You need an epi pen and should be going to the ER with a reaction like your reaction. Please take care of yourself. I would miss you terribly!

  24. I laughed and I cried through this one...Bee safe sweetie!!

  25. You.Are.My.Favorite.Comedienne!

  26. It's been a couple of days and you haven't posted an update on how you're feeling.....just a note to let you know California is thinking of you and praying you are feeling better!

  27. As you told of your encounter with the bees, I felt the anxiety. One thing that I've heard about bee venom is that it is good for arthritis, so you may be saved from any arthritic pain in the near future. -Tracy


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  30. Dancing With Bees. I can imagine you dancing around stripping off your clothes as you ran. Hope you are feeling okay today. I don't think I want to keep bees. I'm having enough trouble keeping my chickens alive.

  31. How about... "Another reason? Goats don't sting."

    Ouchie, lady! Those bees are prickly varmints.

  32. I'm in trouble bahaha I am dying. Hilarious and I miss thee so.
    Someone left my clothes out in the rain bahahaha

  33. If Ever I Lose My Faith In STING! I think Glenco could be humming this under his breath as he tries to help you with your shenanigans...jus' sayin'...

  34. P.S. If I could make my own song it would be "Bring On the Bees", because with all the fat I have lost out of my face, I could use a little "swoll on my face"....

  35. How about, Girl gone wild!. You were tempted to plant garden in a wasteland, you thought yourself impermeable to your 'pet' bees, you stripped down to your skivvies on your lawn.... You sure lead an exciting life! Lol

  36. Beelieve it. . . or not

  37. I usually am filled with Jayme envy. It seems sometimes your "Jayme Escapades" are so fun filled, but this is one, I would not have wanted to be present for. Never a dull moment for Glenco. I hope that you are all right. Need an update please. How about a title of MisBEEhaving, especially with the striptease/streaking finale.

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