Thursday, March 18, 2010

Crippled at Hillbilly Haven

I thought this picture was a good representation of how I'm feeling at the moment.
A hillbilly.

Please don't get me wrong. I do love hillbillies.
I'm from a long line of fine southern people.
Wouldn't change that heritage for anything.

There's just something about this time of year that makes me feel like
a hillbilly on an episode of 'American Pickers'.
I walk around wondering who brought all of this junk onto my property.
Things just seem dirty and messy during the month of March.

The weather has been fantastic the last few days, and today promises the same.
I've been working in the yard non-stop.
Cleaning out sheds, the back of the garage, etc.
It's madness.
I'm crippled.
It all seems overwhelming at this time of the year.
The work that lay ahead.
Almost seems impossible at times, and I start looking at moving to a condo.
Last May I actually called a few places!
In June I come to my senses and love my home again, until August hits and the garden is weed filled and burnt by the hot August sun.

I'm so glad that you all enjoyed the Vintage Camper post!
Remember my idea to make a Bed & Breakfast out of campers?

This is what I've come up with:

Knowing I'm going to be much too busy with the garden to run
the B & B, I hired this
gal to take care of that for me.

Selma Jenkins.

It's all good.
When you call for reservations, please ask for her by name.


  1. You make me laugh out loud!! Jayme, you are such a character! (In a good way, I mean.)
    My place looks like hillbillies live here that's for sure. I love your B&B manager, is she a relative? ;-)

  2. I adore the plans for the B&B....I may even want to be your 1st guest

  3. That Selma, she is one class act. I'm sure she will bring in the best clientele. Love the trailer condo!

  4. Jayme,

    I sent you my photograph in confidence and not to use it in a post! (Yes, I am laughing!)

    I feel much the same way about March and have my own definition for "March Madness"!

    Your B&B is just the place for a romantic getaway or next years Blissdom Blogging Convention!


  5. Oh Jayme,
    I never, NEVER know what I'm going to get when I visit here. What you serve up from your menu is just so unique and has so much variety. NEVER the same thing twice. I am hooked, girl. And can you make me laugh! Oh that last photo is a golden treasure! Where do you dig this stuff up? The B&B??? doh....Looks like it must be on the outskirts of "Green Acres". I'm just looking for the pig somewhere there in the foreground...hmmm.
    You are my laughter each day. :-)
    And of course you are inspiring me to get out of this chair and go outside and work since it's not raining! so away I go, and thanks for giving me a smile on my face as I go. You TOO funny!!!!! Have a happy! hugs.

  6. Jayme...this post cracked me up! I have to confess that I've dreamed of condo living a few times too...usually at the end of the summer when I'm exhausted from all the outdoor work and we even live in town. I'd miss my gardens though...LOL!

    Thanks for the chuckle today.

  7. If I had half of your energy. My body hurts and I have hardly done anything.
    You never cease to amaze us with your humor and charm.
    Take a break...slow down some. (I'll try to motivate myself to get out and do some yard work for ya.)
    love and hugs.

  8. You are definitely a "best seller" writer!!!! I am still laughing! You are too funny. I love the camper condo. But, in truth I know you love living where do. Have a fun day or cleaning and organizing. Wish I could join you. I am a great cleaner-uper!

    Laugh out loud.

  9. What about a chicken coop for that new B & B you got going there? I saw just the thing the other day - it would fit right in keeping with your decor and ambiance. It was lovingly recycled from an old dyer. Or you could use the back end of an old vintage car to got with the vintage campers! I'll send pics soon!

    Can't wait for the ribbon cutting ceremony! What's Selma going to wear? I want to dress appropriately!

  10. Jayme -

    I can totally relate! I am having a LARGE gathering at my house this Saturday and I have been working feverishly to have the inside AND the outside look good!! After an entire winter of dog poop collecting in my backyard - it is a disaster!

    picking up faster and faster

  11. I love it~

    I love the condo~
    If I win the LOTTO I want to build one! I think it would be cool!

    I will be back later to show my hubby!

    Warm Blessings,

  12. I think Selma needs a bigger pair of stretch pants. A little more elasticity would cure a lot for her.

    The Blue Ridge Gal

  13. I know what cha mean - It looks pretty rough out here in our neck of the woods too! Once things start turning green, its beautiful. But now? Not so much!

  14. There is something seriously wrong with you. And please quit pickin on my Aunt Selma. I call the robin's egg blue one, okay?

  15. Are you reading my mind?
    I have declared that this Saturday will be yard clean up day. How can the flowers grow when the yard is covered in, I don't even know what to call it? Just trash and lost things, and old chicken wire, and old boards, and on and on and on.

    Love the pictures and your names for the family.

  16. Oh Jayme !!! I am laughing so hard!! I love the post today. I was thinking the same thing about a hour again. My yard to terrible !!!

  17. I'm crippled too, I'm even wearing a knee brace these days to prove it. How did I hurt myself, well I was walking, then it hurt. Old age! Thanks for helping find Cousin Selma...

  18. What? No chickens? Hope you get rested up from all that work. Sorry, don't think I'll be calling for a reservation. Selma is scary! LOL

  19. Girl, you so crazy! What should we do with you? You crack us all up. Much love, Raundalee

  20. What a sense of humor you have. Thanks for a chuckle that will linger well into the evening.

  21. Jayme, you'd be miserable in a condo, and deep down, I know you know it!

  22. I"m thinking of reserving the green and white trailer....While I'm there I'll sew up a slipcover for Selma and spray paint a stencil on her blue garbage can. It would add to her allure, methinks.

  23. You soo bad.. but what a darn cute post!!

    with love,

  24. Please post all employees must wash hands when returning to work, why that came to mind I don't know.

    Funny post!

  25. Jayme, Oh my gosh, I'm still laughing after reading todays blog. Thanks, I almost peed. Hugs, Cynthia

  26. Good golly is Selma ever scary. I actually think the stack-o-campers is kinda cool. I absolutely agree with your garden mind set schedule. By August all the babies we are dreaming about now, we will be wanting to die. I can't imagine living somewhere without seasons to bail us out in the fall. Garden on, my friend.

  27. Laughed out loud!!! Very, very funny (and kinda scary too:)

  28. I wanna know just where you were hiding when you took that picture of me on our back porch?! Sneaky little Coop Keeper you. Lucky for you I didn't use that rifle "hiding" behind my lounger there!

  29. Jayme - I am so glad I found your blog! And you live in CP too! That means I can stop by the B&B anytime :)

    You are one twisted lady; I like that in a person :)

  30. Jayme, we have so much in common. And, my husband is a neuropsychologist and just dies when I say crippled or retarded. I guess I keep doing it just to hear him fuss. I'm a farmer/gardener chicken and animal lover too. Love the trailer B & B's. Think I'll pass though.

  31. Oh Dear GAWD! I thought I had seen it all... LOL LOL LOL!

  32. tee hee... I think we have all thought of the condo or townhome at one time or another LOL...

  33. Love a good on country post of *reality*...hahaha

  34. You are a hoot! I think Selma is lovely and should be on the front of your B & B ad. Is that decorating syle early junkyard? Especially love the shotgun behind the settee, how do I know???? I live next door! Ha ha!

  35. Ha! I know what you mean about feeling like a hillbilly this time of year. I keep giving my husband heck for the truck bed liner he threw out in the back yard last November.
    Love that camper hotel! My grandpa used to live in one like that--it was pink--OK, I need to shut up, because now you really think I'm a hick.

  36. THIS post is hilarious! Please don't move to a condo! I need to get to work on our yard, too...and the trash that has been left behind along the side of the road by all of the yahoos that live out this way? Shameful!
    I said I want to wear a shirt while I pick up trash that says "Picking up trash for the idiots!"

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  38. Good Lord! I had to share this post with dh.

  39. are hysterical and I love it! This was the funniest dagone thing I've heard all week...I CANNOT take it! I love visiting here, LOVE it! Thanks,

  40. oh my!! this is hilarious...thanks for the laugh!

  41. oh gee just read this post from before I knew you... this is the picture my daughter Abbie uses as her header for her blog. She lives in our trailer park and calls her blog Little Trailer, Big People. She is 5'11 and her husband is 6'5. I thought this pic was great! So funny to see you use it.I have so many more of your posts to entertain myself with!


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