Tuesday, November 23, 2010

When Oldness Happens....



I remember watching a movie a while ago.
There was an old frail woman with paper thin skin and sparse gray hair on her head, wearing a flannel nightgown.
I commented to Glenco 'Oh, I worry about looking like that one day.'
His reply?
'You don't need to worry honey - you will look like that one day whether you worry about it or not'
See what I have to live with?

When does this happen?
This oldness?

Lordy - look how gray I am - time for a touch up!

How is it that you can look in the mirror one day and your skin is soft and supple, plump and tight, and then what seems like the next week, it's thin and crinkly? Let's not even get started on the age spots.

It's like waking up fat.
Those of you that struggle with your weight will understand that one.
It's like you just wake up one day - and  you're fat.

I woke up old today.
And then it was noon and I was still in my flannel gown and I thought to meself, I thought 'Why not post some raw photos of yourself on the World Wide Web?'

Whilst putting on my makeup today I really noticed it.
Lines.
Lots of them.
I don't remember this happening.

I felt I had a choice in that moment, and I needed to be careful of the choice I made.


With my giant brain, I'll rule the world!


I could choose to fight it - and worry about it - I could choose to spend money on trying to fix it and end up looking like a mummified old person anyway.  I'm not mentioning any names, but you've seen them on the cover of People.

Or, I could choose to look at each line like a medal of honor.
Badges - not wrinkles.

I chose the latter.
Why?
It's cheaper - #1, and doggone it - it's the only way you can look at it without getting downright depressed!


99% of my wrinkles are laugh lines.
Now, that's a lot of laughing.
Something to be thankful for.

I only have one 'bad wrinkle.
It's in my forehead.
I frowned for one year straight whilst recovering from a serious heart infection due to contracting the Chicken Pox at the age of 42.

It bothered me for a while, seeing that wrinkle.
Now I fondly caress it as a reminder of how incredibly fragile and beautiful life is.
I survived!  I could have died, but I didn't.
God knew you needed to read this blog all about chickens and shenanigans!

There's only one cure for old age - and that's dying young.
No thank you.

Oldness happens.
I'm gonna keep my face out the mirror.
I'm gonna keep my face to the sunshine and the wind.
I'm going to live life - wrinkles and all.
Oldness happens when you are busy living your life.
I'm gonna get busy.

62 comments:

  1. I love it and feel the same way about the oldness that's happening around my house too : )

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  2. People ask me at age 66 where is your grey hair.. Oh I say,,"IT's there"... just not too many of them.
    We don't get old we just get more valuable.. Keep smiling ~! I look in the mirror and see all those wrinkles or my grandchildren like to move around the big veins in my hands..(I used to do that to my grandma)...Yikes.. Have a great day~!~! YOU LOOK TIGGERIFFIC~!~! You have beautiful eyes..

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  3. But you are beauty full! And in twenty years you will wonder why you were talking about being old when you were in your 40's. I'll grow old with ya sweetie!

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  4. Twas thinking about this very subject the other day, I was, I was. The forehead wrinkle we share was earned ... it's a badge of honor ... we should wear it proudly. The double chin and turkey neck I was worried about? Not so much. Jayme, dear, your eyes are lovely!

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  5. At this moment in time I just returned from the boiler house to throw some wood into the wood stove,on my return I was asking myself, when did I become so careful-we got ice and things are a bit slick. I was so cautious thinking to myself don't fall, you'll hurt yourself. It shocked me to hear this conversation to myself. When did this happen I ask. I walked through the door sat down and see your post. Oh my lady! You are too funny! You are beautiful girl beautiful!

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  6. WE sure can't stop it from happening so let's all just smile. That's what I do! Laughter is a good thing and I do a bit of it every day.

    P.S. I wish this were a contest because my wrinkles are deeper than your wrinkles and I would win the contest. Now where's my prize??

    Di

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  7. You are beautiful. Period. And you're all kinds of awesome. And I'm proud to grow old with ya. And that fabulous flannel nightgown is all kinds of awesome too.

    At least you put makeup on. :)

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  8. What's that old saying..

    Come grow old along with me..
    The best is yet to be...
    or something like that.

    I know exactly what you mean. One day I woke up and realized that it had happened. I had started to look old...No big banner raised over my head...just a line here and there...a white hair in my eyebrow..WHAT? Seeing the skin on my arm not look young and tight and smooth.

    I, like you, choose to live with the passages of the seasons in my life. I am living and proof that life is good no matter what age you are. I do belive aging (in the mind) is a choice you make. I know people 10 years younger than I am that are OLD...and people that are 10 years older than I am that are YOUNG. Young-thinking, young acting, young-at-heart.

    Bless your for this post. I love it! xxoo Diana

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  9. Awesome attitude, following your lead.

    I have that same wrinkle from a year of fretting for one of my children's life...she survived, as did I. That damn wrinkle is a small price to pay.

    And growing old... sure beats the atlernative. I'll take it if I'm lucky enough.

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  10. Old is as old does.

    You are NOT old!

    I have a "butt crack" wrinkle in my forehead. I figure when it gets up past my hairline, who cares?

    I've decided to embrace it b/c you keep having to do botox and I'd rather buy countertops and furniture!

    Let your beauty shine from within, not from the adornment of externals! You're beautiful...inside and out!

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  11. This is one of my favorite blogs. I love what you said about the alternative, dying, no thanks. Let's stay busy living. Your a dear to share so openly. My grays came in silver so that almost sparkle in the light, making them even more noticeable. You know he makes me keep them covered, but it takes less and less time to see them again. lol I rememeber your infection and how I worried so about you. I'm so glad the Father didn't take you home yet, we all need and enjoy you soooo much. I love you deeply bestie. See ya at the table on Thurs. xoxoxox

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  12. I am with you 100% on this!! I earned every wrinkle, frown line, laugh line, gray hair, age spot and sagging muscle. I got them working hard and living harder.

    I am actually longingfor more gray hair. I was platinum blond naturally growing up and then I got darker. I think I look better with lighter hair so gray will do nicely thank you very much!

    Thanks for another great post! I hope you don't mind I snagged one of your pictures for my last post. I did give you full credit and linked to you as well.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

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  13. Great post today. Awesome attitude.

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  14. oh Jayme there is a "cure" for oldness I got it a long time ago it is called bad eye site. Works like a charm if I can't see the wrinkles nor the lines then they must not be there. Some might think this a sign of denial but not me. So don't put your glasses on when you put on makeup or do your hair and all is quiet well with the world. nancy settel

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  15. Amazingly REAL post my friend. I'm just a couple of years behind you in age and I do know what you mean. Where in the world have all those years gone?? But as you said, the only cure is dying you and NO THANK YOU I'LL PASS ON THAT ONE. Age really IS in the mind and I am gonna act young till folks are laughin' at me, and I won't care ONE BIT!!!

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  16. I proudly consider my gray hair to be silver highlights- they are the shiny me coming through. And every wrinkle is the patina of a good, full life and busy days. Even that line between my eyebrows I consider to be payment for concentrating on something that was worth paying attention to. Acceptance lends a beauty that fighting a losing battle never will.
    You and this blog add a few smile wrinkles to lots of faces!
    kim

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  17. Perfectly put, my younger friend ;) I'm not sure when all this "old" stuff happened either, but I'm pretty sure it was this year sometime. Sheesh! The year of my 50th b-day and wham! My first surgery. Bam! My first regular prescription, a heart medication. Wow, how fun is this 'growing older' thing?? ;) -Tammy p.s. you are still a pretty pretty girl!

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  18. I am so tired of all the makeup companies making us feel like there is something wrong with looking older. There must be something wrong with it or they wouldn't be pushing all of their creams, serums, and oils to rehydrate, redefine, and diminish the fine lines and wrinkles. And what about hair color companies that makes you feel that having grey hairs makes you look bad? I have wrinkles, grey hairs, and even age spots, and you know what? I earned every single one of them and I am NOT going to pretend that I am an age that I'm not. I am 44 and proud of it!

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  19. Thank you for that post!!!
    Every time I see somebody with a botox/plastic surgery face I wonder what happened to growing old gracefully. I'm not talking about letting myself go, but embracing what life has given me. Am I always thrilled about wrinkles, laugh lines and gray hair? No, but it's part of who I am. And I'd much rather grow old than die young...
    Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

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  20. I woke up with the same thoughts and wore my jammies till noon! I thought I was creeking but it was hubbies shoes! We shouldah had ah cuppah cyber coffee together and laughed till the cows come home. Ya well I turned 59 recently and this year let my hair color grow out. Yikes! I have dark brown walnut hair with only a few silvers! Ya well the rest went but my humor will always remain. Be careful now on that ice, any age it can be awful. Big ole hugs yer way girlie.

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  21. OHhhhhh, I'm so right there with you friend!! I finally let the color go in June and now I"m actually glad I did - wondered why I was so fearful of going grey in the first place. I'm keeping it short and stylish so it helps me not look so drab. Funny thing, grey is the new Hollywood chic. Check out all the gals going grey gracefully - Jamie Lee Curtis for one. Apparently even Lady Gaga thinks grey is hot (although she's NOT). Check out these sites...

    http://www.goinggraylookinggreat.com/
    http://goinggrayblog.com/

    But the gal who I admire the most... Emmy Lou Harris. SHE was grey before grey was COOL (or is it HOT - am I telling my age? What is the correct slang these days?)
    Blessings,
    Your Grey Headed CHIC Homestead Friend... Amy

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  22. I used to pluck my gray hairs out one at a time until they beat me. Then I tried coloring them, but my husband (the beloved Swede) said he really liked them. "Besides," he said, "you're getting old. Deal with it." I think he and Glenco may possibly be related. Have been debating blogging about the way menopause causes hairs to grow on my chinny-chin-chin, but somehow I think your post is funnier. So glad you lived to write about chickens and shenanigans. Shenanigans are almost my favorite thing to read about and have.

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  23. Amen sister! You are beauty full. (fpfg)

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  24. Frankie sang it best:

    Fairy tales can come true, it can happen to you
    If you’re young at heart
    For it’s hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind
    If you’re young at heart

    You can go to extremes with impossible schemes
    You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams
    And life gets more exciting with each passing day
    And love is either in your heart or on it’s way

    Don’t you know that it’s worth every treasure on earth
    To be young at heart
    For as rich as you are it’s much better by far
    To be young at heart

    And if you should survive to 105
    Look at all you’ll derive out of being alive
    Then here is the best part
    You have a head start
    If you are among the very young at heart

    Bet you'll still be humming that on Thanksgiving!
    Miss you my friend.

    Deborah

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  25. Love your thoughts on wrinkles and aging. I agree! Great post~

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  26. Jayme, I think your skin looks beautiful you have a great complexion! Yes we are going to get old sometimes I get depressed when I see the giant skunk stripe coming back every month or that permanent frown line in between my eye's but can't let it get to us! We are all beautiful in our own ways. We must embrace it like you said the alternative is dying! You have too many chickens to raise,adventures to have and I have to many traesures to hunt for! So we all get old together and love it!!!We can be the sassy older ladies that are still hip and fun!! Traci

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  27. You look great!!! You certainly act young too. I love that!I always tell people add 10 years to your age and people will rave about how great you look! I am 51(truly) and sometimes feel really old, especially looking at my daughters... 28,26,24. But I am embracing it. Someone at church was surprised by my age and said I was a cool mom? I had to wonder oh I am I dressed inappropriately for my age? AH I don't care. Life is better than ever. My youngest is a hiar stylist so she keeps me colored and I earned every laugh line and wrinkle.
    We leave for Disney in the morning with all our kids and grandkids and I promise you I will cry on Mainstreet"s beauty when we walk in and I will take pictures with every character we see. Last time I rubbed Donald Ducks booty. Too cute, couldn't help myself. Bird lover that you are, I know you would too! Have a great Thanksgiving you spring chicken!!

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  28. Jayme, you're beautiful inside and out, and you have beeeee-autiful eyes! Focus on living happily and enjoying every day to the fullest...nightgown or not!

    We're all in this boat with you, and I'm glad you have the words to express what I'm feeling inside!

    Tamarie

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  29. Atleast your eyebrows were plucked and look awesome...along with the rest of that "old" face. ha. You are amazing!

    xoxo

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  30. I'm with Glenco. Why worry about something you can't do anything about. But - just think - when you get a little older, you'll qualify for DISCOUNTS! I'm actually looking forward to that.

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  31. With eyes like those no one will notice anything else! <3

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  32. Jayme, you're beautiful wrinkles included. I think they are the map to all journey we've traveled and oh what a journey. To "fix" them would erase the journey, not mention one looks a lot like a ventriloquist's doll in the end :) Your advice is priceless--and so on target!
    Hugs, Amy

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  33. great post! yep.. wisdom, laughter, heredity (i think of the people who have passed whom i take after), and entitlement! dang, if i get older then i get my way! ha ha.

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  34. Have we been looking in the same mirror? Oh well, I wouldn't trade the life experience and joy that those lines represent. And that inflated wanna pretend that I look young look...no thanks! I rather count my blessing in reality. Have a blessed Thanksgiving sweet lady, Patty

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  35. I have been lamenting my oldness for two solid days. I even told Cory tonight, "I don't need a full face lift, just a MINI face lift" then I demonstrated exactly how/where I needed "pulled back" a bit.

    Don't laugh.

    It's true.

    I wasn't wrinkly until my 34th year. I'm aging prematurely.

    I blame...well, I won't even say it. But you know exactly who I'm thinking of.... ;)

    ps- You're entirely lovely. Truth.

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  36. Just let it happen naturally... "Botox is for cheaters" !!

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  37. Yes! Lovely lady! Celebrate life! Wrinkles... laugh lines... thin skin... gray hair... etc., it's who we are and we are much happier if we embrace ourselves instead of trying to change nature. I'll be 70 in February and the only thing I was happy to change was me being able to get into my size 10 jeans and out of the 14's. I have a lot more energy when I'm thinner.

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  38. When I hit fifty wrinkles, gray hair, flabby things..whew...hit hard....but look at the other option...Have a great holiday! jan

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  39. Jayme, you posted this just in time for me. I have recently discovered some wrinkles that "just popped up" (LOL) and I've been fretting about them. I'm thinking of them completely differently now. Thank you! Jackie

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  40. You are beautiful! And oldness? It hasn't happened to you yet - I think it has to do with attitude...there's just something about it.

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  41. This is some awesome writing, Jayme! I agree with your take. The people that spend gobs of dough to look younger never really look younger. They just look like they've done work. And, I'm not just sayin', I think you look great....inside and out. Have a blessed Thanksgiving.

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  42. Its funny, I got my picture taken yesterday for my blog, and my neck looked like Yertle the Turtle....I blogged about it...We I guess are supposed to get better with age................right?

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  43. My Grandmother, who was in her late 80's at the time, was complaining about the "annoying old people" at the grocery store. My uncle pointed out that she WAS one of those old people. To which she replied "Not if I don't look in the mirror I'm not!"

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  44. Kudos to you Jayme for this great post....feeling the exact same....my chickens and goats don't care about my wrinkle lines, grey hair or age spots:)

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  45. I'm still in my pj's too, making pies and casseroles, fruit salad and cranberry sauce. Doesn't bother me..if someone comes to the door I'm too busy to answer anyway. One word Jayme, Hope in a Jar...Philosophy, QVC or Sephora. 58 and I'm fighting it with the big guns. You have GREAT skin, one dang wrinkle ain't bad! Hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving...

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  46. Ooooh, who does FPFG blame for her premature aging? I dearly hope it's not me!
    Jayme, you are all the best kinds of beautiful, inside and out, and your outlook is perfect - just the outlook you'd expect from a mama bee. =)

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  47. I truly think those are gorgeous pics. Love your light natural make-up and youthful look. I never tried to ease the aging. Farm life is hard on the skin, but I'm proud of how I use my old bod and the weather it's seen. I've also had rosacea forever. "It is what it is!" Being an older mom, I was once asked if baby Sarah was my grandbaby... I decided that person was boorish, stupid, rude etc etc etc and kept on smiling broadly as I said no, I'm just blessed! You too are blessed in many ways and I am grateful for "meeting" you here. Hope you enjoy an awesome Thanksgiving!
    hugs,
    Leslie

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  48. Good for you, Jayme! I choose to do the same. I seldom wear makeup. I'm out in the garden so much, and I like to feel my pores open in that wind you speak of.
    Brenda

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  49. Heavens to Betsy you have the most beautiful grey blue eyes and your skin, flawless.
    Donna

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  50. wow...how incredible that we all get to share this journey together...i love your heart...and the sparkle in your eyes...i don't care how many wrinkles there are as long as there is a sparkle...this is so timely as i just did the big *5-0* and am going through all of the same thoughts and struggles.
    Have a blessed day giving thanks1
    Rene

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  51. I am older than you and have lots more of all the stuff you spoke about in this blog post. But, let me tell you all that does not matter. It is all attitude and what you have in you heart. You have a heart-full of all good thigs.

    Smile and enjoy.

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  52. I love your realness and candor. You are us and we are you. It is why we love your blog and embrace you, as we should embrace ourselves. Your are refreshing,real and true.
    As long as you are young in thought and deed, what is on the outside doesn't seem so old. Thanks.
    B.

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  53. I look at it this way, "beauty comes from inside."

    Not to worry!

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  54. I can stand the wrinkles. What I have a problem with is the stiffness in the morning. I don't understand what happened to me!!!

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  55. You my dear will never grow old! My life is so much more blessed because,FPFG told me a year ago to drop by. You sure helped me through a tough time in life. And the laughter you provoked has slowed down my own aging.

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  56. We’re a group of volunteers and starting a brand new initiative in a community. Your weblog supplied us valuable information to work on. You have done a marvellous work!

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  57. Jayme, you are brave and beautiful!

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  58. love this post! very well put!

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  59. I love you silver hairs, you are beautiful. My husband is getting silver while with my genes I have to wait.

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  60. Ah!!! at last I found what I was looking for. Somtimes it takes so much effort to find even tiny useful piece of information.

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