I'm up way late in the night - and I'm not sure why - I'm most definitely ready to sleep - but I just wanted some me time me thinks.
I've been finding myself quite nostalgic today.
Missing many things.
Life is so different this year - and that's okay - but I'm seeing more and more clearly that I really had the life I wanted - and dadgum it, I want it back!
I miss you guys. I miss my drivel.
I miss sharing my life with you.
I miss sharing my trials, my triumphs, my conclusions, and just my little corner of the world in general.
I really, really, really miss my garden.
I'm shocked at how left untended for such a short period of time, things quickly go south.
This applies to many areas - our relationships, our health, our homes, and our gardens!
All the following pictures were taken when the garden was tended regularly.
I miss having time to sit in the garden and read - and have my hair arranged so nicely with baby birds in it! I miss nurturing things. People, plants, animals....
I miss telling you things like 'oh, I have 19 chickens now - two roo's - one Copper Maran - who rules the roost - a fine proud bird that is kind-ish to the other rooster - a Black Barred - who is so lovely and gentle...
I've so wanted to tell you about HopSing - the crippled bird that I have - and the lesson that I learned from her - that sometimes helping hurts - and some people and things are just better left alone.
I really, really miss knitting, and yarn, and needles.
I also miss this scarf.
I lost it this Spring! It was so much friggin' work too.
I miss having time to be ridiculous...
I miss having time to wash my dishes and meditate whilst I do.
I miss this...
Oh and I miss these pants!
They were some of my favorite pants, but now - well - let's not talk about it!
I miss my bees - they just all up and left a couple of months ago - the yard seems quiet without them.
I'm certain I'll get them again...
I miss my sister - nearly gone a year now - the reality is impossible to grasp, she doesn't seem gone to me - and really she isn't...til soon Vivvie...
I miss outside. I miss taking the time to gaze upon the outdoors.
I freaking miss my ducks. Maude and Claude.
I know Claude has gone on to the great big pond in the sky - but Maude? Where she be? There's a nesting pair of mallards that return every Spring now - and they come oddly close to the house - I believe it could be her.
I miss hours spent meandering greenhouses...
I miss the smell of my camper - The Squirrel - I miss padding out there barefoot on a gorgeous night like this one - sleeping out under the stars with the frogs singing and the fireflies flitting -
I miss typing here and figuring out what I think and I believe as the cursor blinks on -
I miss you guys.
I cannot say it enough - I miss my garden!
Don't hate - but I'm almost hoping that this comes sooner than later...
At least then the garden and it's demise will be out of my control...
Now it's not all gloom and doom - nay - it's actually all very good.
I've set a goal for this year - and I do believe I'll reach it - and then I am scaling WAY WAY back - no more three and four markets a week - no more every week - nope - just here and there - and whatever makes me happy. It's just this year that I'm sacrificing so much. I've met the most incredible people and I'm learning so much. Learning what is truly important to me - learning what hard work really is.
You know - I've never really had much in the way of material wealth - but looking back at my old blog posts from years past, I realize I was the richest girl in the world.
What an enormous blessing to realize that.