Monday, September 13, 2010

Sleeps With Chickens


Photo from Mother Earth News


That's my new Indian name.
Glen gave it to me at 3am this morning when he found me in my chair in the livingroom with a bra on, covered in poison ivy and sleeping with a baby chicken.

There is never a dull moment in this house.

I would love to show you some pictures, but I'm too tired to take them.  Sleeping with a day old chicken isn't easy.  I do remember a couple of dreams, so I know I slept some. The poor thing nearly chirped itself to death last night before I finally got up at 11 and consoled it. 

To clear up any confusion - Maude was sitting on 9 duck eggs, I suppose whilst she was away from her nest, a chicken happened upon it and decided to lay an egg herself.

Ergo - two chicken eggs be up in the nest, and one hatched.

I've spent the morning searching for more baby chickens.
Poultry Auction, Craig's List.

Maude is proving to be as unstable as a teenage brat star.  I don't know that I need to elaborate here and compound her shame.  She couldn't have mothered this chicken, as she kept leaving the nest and leaving it exposed to the three cats in the yard, and the other chickens, which have been known to be rather brutal to babies.  Law, I don't know if that bird be tippin' the bottle or doin' the crack.  Not sure which demon has her, but I'm thinking it's the demon liquor.

She's gone at the moment, and has been off the nest for more than an hour.  The nest isn't covered as it usually is when she's gone.  This doesn't bode well my friends.

I put the stuffed chicken that Cindy brought me in the cage with it - it seems to be soothing it, and breaking my heart at the same time.  I think I have no choice other than buy a small dog purse, paint it's toenails, buy that bird some bling and carry it everywhere I go.

And don't you think for a heartbeat I wouldn't.

44 comments:

  1. The name suits you extremely well. Except you need to add 'semi-topless' to the front. Other than that, perfect.

    You got yourself a circus over there. Maybe Fifi would adopt the new lil one? Hope that stuffed chicken will comfort the poor little thing. It always comforted me. In a creepy kinda way. But still...

    ReplyDelete
  2. How cute! You always make me smile! Take care of that poison ivy!

    ReplyDelete
  3. btw... I love the new look to your blog. I've been busy all summer and am just now getting back into a routine. Want to update mine, it is out dated with everything from who I want to follow to pictures etc. I really like how yours covers the entire page! Love how yours looks!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh i have been there only with pug puppies. I had a couple of litters where I had to set the alarm to do feedings, had to take it with me b/c it ate every 2 hrs. After runts were big enough to adopt out, I cried like a baby to let them go. I only let them go b/c family took them!
    I think a dog purse could be a great new look especially if you go with the semi-topless! Hope the poison clears up. Miserable! Try to get a nap or go to bed with the chickens tonight!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poor baby! Hope you find it some chick-mates soon and you can get some sleep! And how about that poison ivy - any chance of finding where it is and getting Glenco to rip it out! If you're like me, you'll keep running into it. It's taken me three weeks to heal from my recent run in with a zucchini plant - I had no idea I'd be so allergic to those prickly thing on it! I know pick zucchini with gloves on!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You know that I'd be doing the same thing! And w/ poison ivy, less is more (speaking of clothing options).

    Our local Orscheln store (farm store here) brought in a new round of baby chicks two weeks ago. I was shocked to see them this time of year. So, if you haven't already, check in at your local farm store :) Good luck, and happy chicken cuddling (a fave activity of mine) -Tammy

    ReplyDelete
  7. This just cracks me up. Mostly because it sounds so much like me it's almost sickening. I'm such an animal mother.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poison ivy? You have poison ivy? Oh no!! That can't be too comfortable, I'd take the bra off too!

    Di

    ReplyDelete
  9. Always an adventure at Jayme's house! Better you than me ~ with this menopause thing kicking in on me, I can barely handle a hen that limps, let alone a poor little chirping chick. I'd be crying.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I knew I had gone over the edge when I got up several times a night to check on our last batch of chicks. Had to make sure they were good and warm :)

    I completely understand

    Have you had a talk with Maude? To let her know she now has responsibilites? That her running around time is over?

    ReplyDelete
  11. I just laughed right out loud at work and I'm sure the folks around me know work couldn't possibly be so entertaining. Jayme, I think you are perhaps the most fun-loving, caring, sweet and HONEST, down-to-earth woman I know. I will pray that Maude mends her meandering ways!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh, the visual of you carrying a painted toenail chicken in a dog purse is my giggle for the day! You are FUNNY!

    ReplyDelete
  13. You crack me up! I think Glenco found the perfect name for you. Where are you finding the poison ivy? It seems like various bloggers from down there seem to have it too. Not too common around these parts.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Only on your farm!! It gives a new twist to the ugly duckling story. Not that your new baby is ugly! I find him or her rather beautiful. I can't wait to hear what you will name the little one. Give an update also on Aaron's new school adventure, I am sure he is charming the socks off of them, you gotta love that guy.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I can't help you with the chickens - but I can't help you with the poison ivy. Indian's rarely get it so now that you have an Indian name, you must learn their secret. In the olden days they ate the plat, but since we are not in touch with nature enough anymore to be able to do that without a raction, we do the next best thing. Go to your helth food store and get some Rhus Tox. Disolve about 4 day in your mouth until the bottle is gone. Every year in January or February get a new bottle and do it again. It's like a poison ivy vaccination and it you take a bottle once a year you will most likely not get poison ivy - and if you do get it, it will be more like a mosquito bite than a full fledge rash. I used to get it off my kids fishing clothes doing laundry, off the dog, or just from the air, and now I can lay down in a poison ivy patch and not get it at all. And - a bottle of Rhus Tox is maybe $7.00. That's way less than I used to spend for relief.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oooooh poison ivy, been there, not fun. Try soaking in Aveeno oat bath, works pretty good. Take care.:) Cyn

    ReplyDelete
  17. Maybe you'll start a new trend. Wouldn't it be funny if Paris Hilton started carrying a chicken in a bag instead of a mini dog?! Hey, maybe that's where Maude got her crack!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Jayme, I think the purse is a must!! You can start a new trend. You know how trendy chicken raising is now--so this purse and chick pedi is just around the corner. If you do it--I know we will see Paris and entourage following suite :) I love this story and it warms my heart. Good Momma!
    Amy at Verde Farm

    ReplyDelete
  19. That picture is so freakin' cute. I love it when they first hatch and they fall asleep at random times. It is so sweet to watch.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Almost nothing scarier than livestock on the demon liquor.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Aww she needs some other babies to cuddle with. I am of no help because I would come to you for advice on my chicken issues. Too bad you have no broody hen that will comfort her or he. I just posted my middle daughters cute hen house a couple of days ago along with pictures of some of her ducks. She got a Indian Runner (I believe that is what she called it) by accident when she got the other ducks this spring. Thought she had girls and ended up with 3 boys 2 girls. Poor little Indian Runner has had her Mohawk torn right out of her head. I thinks daughter is ready to find a new home for a couple of beastly boy ducks.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Jayme, you made me laugh my tail off! I LOVE your blog...please don't ever stop writing here, I don't think I could handle the withdrawals!

    ReplyDelete
  23. It's usually the chickens that scratch. Monkey see monkey do. Hope you feel better soon. Enjoyed my visit today.

    ReplyDelete
  24. certifiable. bonafide nuts. and luv you for it!

    ReplyDelete
  25. You can't just put it in a cardboard box with some newspaper, a heat lamp, and some food and water? I've raised jillions of batches of chicks that way.

    Besides, if it's in your bra, doesn't it poop all down inside your shirt? :-/

    ReplyDelete
  26. Jamie, you girl can tell a story. I chuckled the reading the entire post. Poor chicky though. I don't know squat about chickens let alone baby chicks so I applaud you. Don't know if I could cuddle with a chick in my bra either. Maude though what is up with the no mothering maternal instinct thing. Claude's death must have done one heck of a number on her. Hope everything works out for you, Maude and the baby chick.
    Donna

    ReplyDelete
  27. Oh, I know you would. In less than a heartbeat! Bless your heart and that of the baby chick. What on earth is wrong with mothers these days? Not tending to business. A crying shame.
    Brenda

    ReplyDelete
  28. Jayme, you are so funny and sweet!
    This is a great story! Thank you for sharing...

    Tamarie

    ReplyDelete
  29. Cute story! And I can totally understand - just gotta whatcha gotta do for the baby animals.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Fortunately, for me, I've never experience poison ivy... I think the little chick in a purse would be a great idea. Just think, you could start a whole new trend. The heck with those little toy breed dogs!

    Chris

    PS I'm still laughing about the visual.

    ReplyDelete
  31. OH do it! I can't wait to see the chick in the purse photo!!
    Sorry about your poison ivy though. Ugh. Isn't there a plant remedy for the itch and rash?
    I'm having a little giveaway at my blog, so stop by sometime.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Sorry I am laughing at your misery. A chicken in a purse.. lol
    and to think that on of the chicken has left her eggs for poor maude to have to take care of.. maybe that is why she left the nest.. Going to find who put more responsiblty on her.. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  33. Sorry I am laughing at your misery. A chicken in a purse.. lol
    and to think that on of the chicken has left her eggs for poor maude to have to take care of.. maybe that is why she left the nest.. Going to find who put more responsiblty on her.. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  34. My friend Suzette sent me over. I had heard about you over lunch one day. Glad I stopped by, the chicken picture and story is the best! Sorry to hear about "Claude's" passing. Best, Kelly

    ReplyDelete
  35. You are right about there never being a dull moment around there. I have never seen a baby chick sleep...one collective AAAHHHH! No words of wisdom here except where can I mail that custom chicky purse to? You go mama hen! Patty

    ReplyDelete
  36. Mother Earth/Jayme, how can so much happen to one person? Maude and her Brittany Spears ways have now landed you smack dab in the middle of motherhood...or maybe grandmahood! I read about it, it's happening more and more these days. Take yer vitamins sweetie...you are in it for the long haul!

    ReplyDelete
  37. I think I found my twin...
    I'ld be buying that bling already! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  38. Duck eggs take longer to hatch than chicken eggs, so just give her a bit. I bet a few will hatch.

    ReplyDelete
  39. This is so sweet - hope that poison ivy heals up for you.
    Warm wishes, Tonya

    ReplyDelete
  40. Any luck today with finding it a mate? Oh, I'm crossing fingers and toes for both you and the little one... xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  41. A woman after my own heart! I've been trying to figure out how I could get little hats and/or bonnets for my chickens and have them pose for a family picture! My husband thinks that's just beyond crazy. Of course, he didn't understand the Halloween costumes for the dogs, either. By the way, LOVE your blog and consider me one of your newest followers!

    ReplyDelete
  42. My day would have been infinitely better had I read this prior to now.

    I just read excerpts aloud to Cory "to prepare you for tomorrow".

    Speaking of tomorrow - what's that baby o' yours gonna do??

    ReplyDelete

Thanks so much for leaving a comment!