Thursday, March 9, 2017

Kickin' Fear to the Curb




It's been approximately 2.5 years ago now that I started selling marshmallows,
and turned my whole danged world upside down. 

Guess what?

I am still alive.
In fact - I'm quite alive, thriving and so happy lately that my face hurts from smiling,
and my heart aches from joy, much like a sore, overworked muscle.


At times, I've been sure I've ruined my life.
At times, I've been sure this was the best decision I've ever made.
Most of the time, I've not been sure of anything, other than being scared half to death.

But.
Now.
At this time.
I'm rather certain that maybe, just maybe this is a good thing.

In the last two weeks or so, I've felt more like myself that I have since the first time I set up
Me Olde Marshmallow Stand at a Farmer's Market.


Land sakes, I've worked so hard in the last couple of years, and sacrificed so many of the things I've loved.
Nary a chicken in the yard.
Nary a bee.
Nary a blossom. 
(I know - it's only March - and I bet if I looked, I'd find a crocus or three.)

I look back on those years of gardening my fingers to the bone, getting the heck stung out of me by my bees, and chicken keeping with the fondest of memories!  The years blogging, raising the BoyChild - what a sweet, sweet time of life!
(Aaron update - he's engaged!  He's 21!  Gahhhhh!)

The house and garden have definitely gotten that 'does that lady live there anymore?' kind of a vibe to it.  In some ways, it's quite liberating - and in others, it hurts my heart to see how two years of not focusing on 'home things' has made the house seem sad looking to the passerby.

You know - it'll be a year next week that Glenco left his truck driving J.O.B. and started peddling marshmallows full time with me.  It's been a journey for sure - and this Sunday - we celebrate our 34th anniversary.  And - I still kinda like him, after spending every waking moment of the last year with him.  Oh, it's been trying at times - but there's been more laughs than scowls (I think, I didn't count).  I only fired him twice in the last year - so that wasn't too bad.  : -)

The moral of the story?

I've survived with hints of thriving.

The housework has been caught up on, and I can with every confidence tell you that my home is the cleanest it's been in 2.5 years.

I have industrial mixers and commercial ovens now, and I'm not working myself
14-16 hours a day anymore.



The shows are much easier now that we use the Squirrel and don't have to set up a booth each time.
I'm happy that she gets to travel so much now.  : -)  Everybody LOVES her! This is still a very rudimentary set up - I have a lot of ideas! 


I came this close to going to get baby ducks today at the feed store today.


Glimpses of Jayme are coming back.
:-)

I've been able to spend time with friends again.

There's a good chance that there will be blossoms and home grown tomatoes in my yard again this year.

I really don't think I truly appreciated my garden until I lost it!

All of that to say this -

Life balances out.

I don't think I ever really realized how difficult it would be to start a bona fide business.  I really, REALLY wanted to share this whole journey with you here - but good grief, I'm lucky I showered at times.  When I look at it - I think - what the heck?  I sell some s'mores out of a camper!?  What's the big deal?  There's not enough time in the world to tell you the work that's gone on behind the scenes.  Mind boggling.  My ADHD doesn't help things - well, it helps SOME things!
I don't think we would have gotten this far in two years if I hadn't been a bit whackadoodle.


What most excites me is the emotional journey that this has been for me.
At times, fear completely crippled me.
Crippled.
It manifested in anger, frustration, and worry.
What if?
How?
It's almost like I thought that we'd DIE if this didn't work out -
when the reality would be - get a job.
What's so bad about that?

Well, it seems to be working out - for now anyhow - and my days are spent with Glenco - whipping sugar into cubes, hauling the camper far and wide - and meeting some of the most fun, creative, kind people you can imagine.  Don't get me wrong - there are many hard moments, but that's true in any profession. 

My days aren't filled with fear anymore - but it has it's moments where it rears it's ugly head, and I have to remind myself that my worst case scenario is me stacking organic romaine at Whole Foods and that actually sounds fun...
so...

fear?

No thanks.

32 comments:

  1. You amaze me, you show me that no matter my age I can do anything I set my mind to do........

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  2. I'm thrilled to see this post! We all have our bumps and giant potholes in our road of life. Stay courageous and give yourself some grace..you're kicking butt in all your followers eyes!

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  3. I'm thrilled to see this post! We all have our bumps and giant potholes in our road of life. Stay courageous and give yourself some grace..you're kicking butt in all your followers eyes!

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  4. So excited to read all your news, and hear your heart 💖 I so admire what you've done, but I admired all you did before too!

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  5. It was so exciting to see your post come up on my Blogger reading list!! Well, look at you just going ahead and making a success out of things! The cute little trailer is perfect - has just the right vibe. -Jenn

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  6. I love reading about your journey, Jayme!...Keep kickin' some butt!...Love you!

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  7. Never a slacker are you? Your attention to detail is amazing and that's why you succeed! I am so very happy for you, Jayme.

    ~Lynda

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  8. I MUST say my ❤️ skipped a beat when I opened my inbox and the Coop Keeper was there! It has been FOREVER and a day since one of your blog entries came through that vast cyberspace. (For some reason I did not receive last Oct. entries.) I will catch up and reread each one. I am thankful you are happy and get to share each day with Glenco. Fly high!

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  9. Love how you write! Side note, I am glad you have this business...selfish reasons....we might not have ever met. You add beauty, fun, kindness, pleasantry, and class to Fetching Market. Thank you for creating such a great product too. I encourage you to keep doing what you're doing until you just don't want to do it anymore! You're an inspiration to so many.

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  10. Jayme, My sweet chicken lady. I have missed you. I am sending big hugs to you. I happy For Aaron, wish him the best. So glad you have Glenco by your side. The marshmellows looks so wonderful. Do you ever sell at Amish Acres, or Middlebury areas? my daughter lives near you. Blessings to you brave girl in the business world. You can do it. xoxo, Susie

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  11. I was SO EXCITED to see a post from you. I've missed you. Seems like every time you are on my mind, a post pops up!! Guess I need to think of you more often!!! I'm so happy that you are happy. That is what life is all about. Trusting Jesus as our Savior and serving others. What an opportunity you have to meet so many people at your Marshmallow Business. And your handsome nephew . . . we want details!!! So happy that you and your hubby get to spend time together doing what you love. But please make time for everything you enjoy, including some chickens and some flowers. PLEASE post often so we can keep up with you and your new life. We all love you!!! Blessings from Missouri my sweet friend!

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  12. Love you Jayme!!! Glad to see a new blog from you!! And the squirrel seems happy being able to hit the road with you so often...Glenco is happy as well I'm sure!! Miss your chicken & her posts at time but that's ok...so happy all is well in your life AND the boychilds life too!!!

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  13. Great to hear from you!!.. I'm thinking.. is there a way for a Connecticut girl to sample your marshmallows? I'm going to look now if they can be shipped... just found your etsy button - that's probably the answer :-) So Happy For you!! But your blog friends miss you.

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  14. Oh how wonderful to read your words today, fully through and back through again. Your determination and strong perseverance despite the niggling questions is an empowering story.Thank you for that "poke in the butt" I am needing to get myself fully committed to showing up to my studio every day. Love every piece of the story of your journey.
    Kristin

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  15. Love hearing your tales! Hope to see you next time we are in CP.....May?

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  16. So very happy for you both!! AND Aaron too!!
    jan

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  17. So happy to hear this update! Your world is going well! I'm glad for you!!

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  18. Congrats- Just popping in to say I read it all and am so happy for you. I am about ready to hit the road here but wanted to say HI and that I am very proud of you. xo Diana

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  19. I am so happy to hear from you, Have really missed you and b.een wondering how you are. You are a brave soul. I am so happy that life is going good for you. Would love to see a schedule of where you are selling this summer. I might have to travel your way for some marshmallow tasting
    tin

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  20. Thrilled to see your pretty little face with those baby ducklings . . .
    Two and 1/2 years . . . I can't believe it . . .
    Thrilled, happy and thrilled again that Mother Wilmar's is sailing along . . .
    One day I hope to walk up to you, and the camper, and say, "Hi, I am Lynne" . . .
    Over the moon happy for you . . .

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  21. Oh Jayme how I have missed seeing your sweet face & blog posts.I am so happy to hear of your sucess. U r an amazing inspiration!

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  22. Yay, you are alive and thriving! So tickled to read about what's happening and happy for your successes! LOVE the Squirrel and want one so badly...keeping my eyes open for one to call my own. What inspiration...I could tote one to our Farmers' Market as well. (and how did you come up with her name??) Glad you had time to post...we all miss hearing from you!

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  23. How wonderful! Keep on doing what you love, loving your loved ones and making a good name for yourself. Those little canned hams are wonderful; mine is named Thistle Cove Poppet.

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  24. So nice to get an update from you. Sounds like you are doing exactly what you should be, although I miss your posts. Congratulation on creating your successful business!

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  25. It's good to hear that you came up for air and everything is turning out great for all of your hard work. Your story is truly inspiring, love the aspect that you can trailer your product around and meet a lot of people at events. Sounds like a great retirement job. Will check your Etsy!

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  26. Oof! You are inspiring!

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  27. I love you and your courage! I suffer from anxiety attacks and it was so refreshing to read your post. You go lovely lady!!!!

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  28. Hello! So glad you are doing well!

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  29. I sure miss you! I've never met another human being who could put into words exactly what is on my heart. Many blessings to you guys! M.

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  30. A camper booth, what a brilliant idea! I hope all is still going well for you, and now that cold weather is upon us I bet you will be selling Hot Chocolate marshmallows like hot cakes!
    (We will all wait patiently for your next post.) :)

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  31. Miss seeing you here! Are you okay?? Hopefully just busy!

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