Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Living Life Less Fabulous




All things are well here.
Nothing much new to report.
My sister is moved and loving Crown Point.
I visited family in Missouri and dodged tornadoes.
Glenco and Aaron are well - thriving even.

The chickens are happy and healthy -  I'm waiting, as I type, on a farmer from Watseka, IL to 
stop by and pick up Lord Grantham.
Its been a hard decision to re-home my rooster - but a decision has been made.
He's a fine chap - but he's just too rough on the hens.  I can't think of a word to describe him.  
It's somewhere between rambunctious and barbaric.
My hens need Rogaine.
Not on my watch L.G. - not on my watch.

The bees are busy and things feel set aright now that I have my boxes full of them again.

The garden - well - the garden is under big time construction.
We've taken down all the wooden 'shabby chic' picket fences. 
At some point during the Polar Vortex they crossed that fine line, going from 
'Shabby Chic' to 'Meth House'.

We are going to replace it with the old wire fence I have.

garden gate and fencing.
from Pinterest

When we took it all down to repair and repaint it - Glenco and I just kind of looked at each other like 'you feel like doing this again when your 70?  Ya, me either.'

I'm reseeding some of the gardens with grass seed.
Although it will save time in the future, it's a ridiculous amount of work right  now.

Some things in my life are coming to an end.

Saying yes to all of this yard work has me saying no to other things in my life.
Other things that I want to say yes to.

Naps.
Bike rides.
Camping trips.
Feeling like things are 'done'.
Day trips.
Hiking.
Knitting socks.
Not smelling like Icy Hot.
Weekends of 'what to do?'
Motorcycle rides to no where.


It's hard to see seasons of life go.
It's hard to admit that you can't do it all anymore.
When your gardens have been fabulous, when you are 'known' for them - it's hard to let that go.
When you are known for your baking - it's hard to see that gone.
When you are known for your humor - it's hard to go through a quiet season.

It seems that right now - everything I've been 'known' for - is gone.
It leaves me feeling a bit lost.
It leaves me feeling.
It leaves me.

This whole business of downsizing - minimizing - it's been quite a journey.
Things are less fabulous.
I don't do a lot of fabulous crafts anymore.
My home is less fabulously decorated.
The gardens aren't 'tour bus' worthy anymore.
There seems to be something in me - or maybe you too - when you like old junk - when flowers feed your very soul - when making home is your passion - there seems to be a propensity to wear yourself flat out.
You work your fool head off to make your life Pinterest worthy.
For what?

I'm going to tell you a little secret that has taken me 52 years to figure out.

fabulous
is 
exhausting.

So here's to a life less fabulous, but more fulfilling.  
Here's to meals that I make that never get photographed and put on a blog. 
Here's to ordinary days filled with extraordinary moments that never get put in a status update.  
Here's to less stuff but more time.
Here's to smaller gardens, better tended.
Here's to more soul time.

Here's to exhaling - and being a human being, instead of a human doing.
Here's to being delightfully average.
And here's to being OK with it.



53 comments:

  1. You......Help.......Me! Thanks!

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  2. I love your proclamation....fabulous is exhausting.
    I often wonder about fabulous blogs, lifestyles, kids, projects; how do these people keep it up and maintain their sanity?
    Thanks for putting the slower and intentional life in perspective.

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  3. ....you took the thoughts right outta my head and put them into words...made me cry but made me smile too...made me say to myself...she's right :) Thank you Jayme...I just LOVE you so much!!

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  4. Refresh, renew....opportunities for something you did not know about yourself to surface with all this new fee time. :)

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  5. Jayme ... you are fabulous! Just by being! xo Thank you I really enjoyed this post. Melissa

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  6. Jayme, this is a beautiful, inspiring post. May God bless you abundantly with peace and fun!

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  7. Thanks for saying exactly how I feel too!

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  8. Just what I needed to hear.
    Blessings, Patti

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  9. yup, I'm right there with you. Change isn't always easy, but sometimes necessary.
    I got there from the head injury and 3 surgeries...it took that to slow me down.
    But slow me down, it did. And now I'm re-evaluating my life, and seeing it all differently.

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  10. my sentiments exactly! I plant flowers for my enjoyment! I don't have the latest design cuz it isn't me, thank you very much! I like listening to the birds feeding, the quail coming in for something to eat, and trying to keep that darned cat from catching those birds, he isn't mine by the way! For a change it is about me!!!!

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  11. Can't help but wonder if this is the message that I'm supposed to be learning. 8 weeks after breaking the right ankle, I fall again and tear ligaments in the left. I'm unable to embrace the imposed stillness. I fight it and fall again. More bruises--now the knee is injured. Spring is passing me by. I can't get to my beloved gardens. My house is a mess. Most days my spirit seems as wounded as my body. I have to accept that I can't do it all. I have to ask for help (not something I've ever been comfortable with). Your post helps me to see it all through a different light and realize that maybe I've been a "human doing" all these years as well--maybe this is my road to "human being"--and maybe that's not so bad.

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  12. You have a way of putting into words very often exactly what I am thinking. It took me nearly 60 years to really begin to understand who I am. Consider yourself well ahead of the curve and enjoy the changes and respite.

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  13. You finally got it.....your awesome for who you are and not what you are doing. I'm so proud of you. Now you can finally relax and enjoy some of your precious life. Can't wait to see you Thur! xoxoxo

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  14. I hear of so many women going through phases in their lives and I am too. We just downsized to a mobilhome by the lake and I am planting gardens in pots. Fun! Small yard beautiful home. I am living life now and I know you will too. My feet are running before they hit the floor saying where shall we go today? You are in a stage of life that hurts yet is freeing at the same time. Seeing all our stuff sell at auction was a big load off my shoulders. It is fun starting over you could say. Hugs my friend.

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  15. At 82 I have just realized all the things you mention..am allowing the Geraniums ,Phlox,and daylilies to overtake the gardens,big old Hostas are happy to oblige as well as other perennials.Clematis still climb up the once painted fences,actually it all seems to be doing very well without my fussing! The brick pathes are more grassed in now,and gardens made with railway ties sort of sinking.I still love it,but does not worry me to see (so called) weeds, I now have time to do all sorts of things,(my chickens had to go to a friend a few years ago)cats keep me company now,(many many!! farmers do not seem to feed them so 'Treecroft' is a good place to be,I see to spaying etc) Life really is short,so I do hope you will enjoy all you do.All the very best to you...Carole

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  16. You put into words what I've been feeling lately. I used to get so upset that our grass didn't look like an emerald green carpet with no weeds, but this year, who cares? Too much $ and time to put weed stuff on an acre sized yard. My house isn't spotlessly clean, like something out of a magazine but who cares? We have clean clothes and clean dishes, the rest is just fluff. I would rather spend my time quilting or scrapbooking.

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  17. Oh my----needed this this morning. Asking myself "WHY am I keeping this stuff?" as I go through teacups and teapots and dishes and sugar bowls. "Why?" I am not having a tea party this big!!!!! I am getting brutal--keeping enough to have a little party with my grandgirlies and giving the rest away. Feels good and will make someone else happy until they get my age and start freaking out. I hear you about the gardens---haven't figured it out completely but it is getting better! Thank you!

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  18. YES YES YES!! Oh my Jayme!! You are so wise to be only 52 years old :). Living less . . . FABULOUSLY!!!! I love it!!! Praying for you today my friend :).

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  19. Your blogs are worth waiting for! Thank you Jayme! Thank you for your humor, and for putting into words the most amazing of thoughts!

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  20. I LOVE this Jayme!!! "Pin" worthy for sure!!!!! =D

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  21. Here's to fabulous less diluted... Fabulous more concentrated. Fabulous none the less! I am right there with you. Pam

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  22. Can't help it. I am selfish and still miss your blog being what it used to be. *sigh* It's good that you are finding peace and happiness in life though. xox

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  23. oh- Amen and amen, Jayme. You say what I think! We are kindred spirits in so many ways. I see YOU in me at that age- when I did all-was all-be all to everyone. It IS hard to step back and not do what you have always done. I don't have the gardens at this house like I had at my other homes. These are easier and nice-just not show-stopping. My home is lovely but I don't redo it and change it all the time like I used to do. I am more willing to slow down a bit on THINGS and invest in TIME-with children and self. You are way smarter way younger than I ever was. xo Diana

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  24. I've been reading your blog for a long time now and you continue to inspire me. I'm 56 and having a hard time "doing it all". You've reaffirmed my recent awareness that "doing it all" isn't "all" its cracked up to be. Here's to just being!

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  25. AMEN! We downsized and neighborhooded at the ripe old ages of mid forties. I mourned the loss of the dream of a few acres, but I'm so thankful now that we can quickly mow, check out our four little square foot gardens, water our four hanging baskets, and then GO. Or REST. Or whatever. There truly is a season for everything, and this season now for me is to take care of the aged and infirm, not House Beautiful. And you're so right...who sees it? For whom do we do this?! Who am I trying to impress?! I even had family over without mopping and without cooking anything from scratch...gasp! Next I'll be having guest while still in my bathrobe. Giggle.
    Stay strong as always, dear Jayme. You are a light on a hill!

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  26. Jayme . . . this was so . . . SO . . .
    You just have the right words at the right time . . .
    I too have noticed the zest in me . . . ebbed . . . altered . . . vanished . . .
    And have found myself . . .
    and I like . . .

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  27. Maybe we need to think about how we define fabulous. Maybe it's all the things you listed. The things that aren't for show but for our souls. Rock on, Jayme!

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  28. Jayme, welcome to the other side of the fence. You are learning that at fifty something and as I have, your mind and body are not cooperating buddies anymore. At this new season of our lives our priorities have changed and that is ok. I have been feeling like this for the last two years. I thought once I retired last June, I would be doing more, but it has been a slow go. Our home is a lot of work, it still brings me contentment, but I have learned to embrace the "If it all doesn't get done today, there's always tomorrow" attitude. Here's to a calmer pace and still savoring our blessed lives we have before us. This cold snap is setting things back and I must just go with the flow. So just like with my body, well, there are some things I have to accept. Nice post Jayme. Its ok, I still think you are fabulous no matter what!

    Debra

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  29. Thank you for your encouraging words!

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  30. It means so much to me to know that you and others feeling and going through the same things as I am. It makes me feel less crazy and more okay. :) We must be on to something if so many of us are feeling the same way. Thanks for verbalizing it and putting it out there for all of us. It gives me strength!

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  31. Sounds to me you are in a transition phase, and I hope it takes you to a place of peace in your corner of the universe ;)

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  32. And this...was perfect! Blessing your sweet soul across the miles!

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  33. Having problems leaving comments. Any tips? Georgeann

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  34. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  35. Naps. Bike rides. Camping trips. Feeling like things are 'done'. Day trips. Hiking.....O my goodness...this brought tears to my eyes....this is where I am at too! Life is going by so fast, I am running low on energy for 'Keeping Up" with the, it use to be the Jones, now it must be the Pinterests. Really it is only my own false perceptions of life! Anyways I still have 4 children at home and a grandchild on the way, my Mom and Sister/family just moved closer by...just want time to be with those I love and not have a long must do first list. GREAT POST! Enjoyed other readers' comments as well. Maybe I will set some new goals like having company over while the house is not tidy and I am in my bathrobe,ha!! I did just host a college graduation party with an unruly spring yard, untended flower beds and a couple of hens that flew the coop and no one cared!! God Bless

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  36. Jayme, great words. Reading the replies it sounds as if many of us are in that stage of simplifying our lives, however that may look to us. I am hoping by next spring, I will have my current (way too big for us now) house ready to put up for sell and buy something much much smaller. I like your list of bike rides, camping trips, and naps!

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  38. Apparently we're ALL exhausted!

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  39. Truth does ring out loud and clear. Acceptance is our choice. I love to read your words because they are a lot of my thoughts in print. Thank you for your honesty and compassion. Now to enjoy instead of Impress. Blessings to you and yours.

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  40. My favorite part of this post: being a human being, not a human doing. Need to be more of that!

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  41. Thank you, Jamie! I just realized last week I am not really interested in keeping up the gardens any more. Thanks for confirming the thought and yeah, I may be looking into some grass seed soon!

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  42. OK, I just heard this one, remided me of you. Why do chicken coops have 2 doors? Because if there were 4 doors, it would be a chicken sedan.

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  43. Hi Jayme. I am a semi-annual faithful reader of your blog. I am fighting the good fight against technology and try to limit my time spent surfing, texting, emailing, etc. but here I am on my mid-year search through my favourite sites and once again you have inspired and impressed me with your words and observations and I want to tell you (from someone who knows you not-a-lick) that you are awesome. Many blessings to you. Becki

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  44. Where have you been my friend missed you.. Just love your post helps with my insane life. Hope all is well with you.

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  45. Hey girl! Haven't heard anything out of you in awhile. Hope all is well!! Blessings from Missouri!

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  46. Yup. I've been thinking along the same lines. Well said, dear poetess, well said. Tony

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  47. Oh what a Profound Post that I could certainly relate to at this particular Season of Life... Fabulous IS exhausting... and the things one can become known for can become more of a chore than a Joy anymore... which is the time to just Let it Go. Hard to embrace quickly tho', I tend to at least attempt to Hold On to some things past when I should have... guess that's part of the Process too. Dawn... The Bohemian

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