The seasons change.
Our moods change.
We as women, go 'through the change'.
We want to change.
Our President promised 'Change'.
We try to change - we beat ourselves up over the things we do that we don't want to do, and the things we want to do that we don't.
Are you as exhausted over it all as I am?
I'm trying to love myself to change.
I'm not even sure what that means at this point - it's a new thought to me.
When I think of change - I think of taking up arms - fighting the good fight - forcing - discipline - lists - and a general boot camp type mentality.
Getting this last ten pounds off has been tough.
Not physically tough - but mentally tough.
I'm trying to love it off of me.
If I ever figure out what I'm even talking about - I'll fill you in.
I'm trying to change alot at once - maybe that's why I'm pooped.
That's why I'm going to therapy for now - for some accountability.
My homework for the last two weeks was to take one day for myself and do what I wanted to do.
I haven't done it yet!
I read all of your comments and absolutely agreed with each one.
Yep, yep and yep.
What we put ourselves through, eh?
I know that change is more than possible - and if we really focus on changing - it happens.
And that my friends is the key - focusing on it.
The list of what I want to change is long - but right now I'm focusing on not expecting so much of myself. I set the standard way too high for myself - and even my Coach said 'you try to bat 1000'.
Here's my "To Do List" today.
Try not to laugh -
It's in no order - just wrote it all down as it came to my mind at 5 this morning over tea.
Make egg rolls for cooking club
tend the chickens - morning, afternoon
finish garden section C
go to the Poultry Auction (Phyllis needs a man)
Cooking Club 12pm at Terry's
Upper body weight training
one hour cardio
finish deep cleaning the kitchen
do coaching reviews
write a blog post
get Aaron to ALC at 5pm
plan my week
take a jar of honey to Debby
pay cell phone bill
varnish the kitchen floor
call re: pavilion rental for the beekeeper's picnic
go to Sunrise Farms after Cooking Club and pick up rest of annuals
I'll be quite frustrated with myself if all of these aren't checked off.
Six of them already are.
As you can see I have no time to blog - and really shouldn't even be here.
In my mind - each and everyone of those if the most important thing to do. I have trouble prioritizing - my mind says "get all the little things done first - and then you'll have time to focus on the big ones - but that's just bass ackwards - I have to get the big important things done first!
Like - making the egg rolls!
I gotta go!
I just wanted to let you know the winner of the serum!
Tracy said...For today...I have once again found myself thinking I MUST have everything perfect before an event...and then I am so exhausted that I don't have the great time I should. That is where I am today. If everyone would please just say out loud to the universe, "Tracy- it's all good, stop already!", I'll be able to really enjoy the Coop Tour and share my love of chickens! Jamie- you look amazing- and are such an inspiration!!
We ain't done talking about this.